Is it worth fighting for?
by xoadorablemissyxo
Summary: Lily Evans had a wonderful boyfriend and was working her way to being a doctor at St. Mungos but a year later she has no boyfriend and a boss who hates her. Now recent run-ins are making her remember why she fell in love with him.
1. Chapter 1

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Harry Potter...blah..blah...blah...Twenty year old Lily Evans sat back in her office chair trying to concentrate on the forms in front of her. She tried to forget the insulting remarks her boss had just yelled in her face. She had worked for St. Mungos for a year now. One long hard year. She tried her best at everything just to prove herself to a boss who clearly hated her for no reason. Ever since Lily first entered on her first day of work Brock Bolter made her life hell. She couldn't do anything right. If it weren't for the fact that being a healer was her dream she would have quit.

She wasn't completely stupid. It didn't take rocket science to figure out that all her co-workers were male. Male co-workers who Brock was so easy on. If you added two and two together it was obvious that Bolter hated the fact more women were becoming healers or just hated women in general. Lily was getting so sick of all the mistreatment.

She thought back to the one-sided argument, they all were one-sided. He dared said she wasn't committed to her job. She was the most committed one in the whole hospital. While her fellow workers were out taking two hour lunches she was filling out reports that they left behind. While they were with their families during the holidays she was taking care of the sick. While Bolter was hiding in his office from an angry patient who he misdiagnosed she was there fixing his mistakes, once again. But it never mattered, she would never be considered an equal in Brock Bolters eyes.

Lily rubbed her eyes thinking. Bolter was a good name for him because that's what he did best. She looked up and her eyes fell on her degree, it took her a year to get that. Usually it took longer but she enrolled once she graduated Hogwarts. She wanted to get her career going as soon as she could. And for what? For this? She shook her head, this was not how she thought she'd be spending her first year as a healer.

There was a quite knock on her door followed by, "Lily?"

Lily looked up finding the only other female worker on the fifth floor, potion and plant poisoning, "Hey, Julia."

Julia was the receptionist and the only one who knew how Lily felt. Julia walked in and closed the door behind her. She would always come on her lunch break giving them both time to unwind and complain about their crappy lives.

"How are you?" Julia asked taking a hair tie and pulling up her black hair.

Lily groaned and laid her head on her desk, "Things just seem to be getting worse."

"I'm sorry, I heard about what Bolter did when you were late this morning," She said sympathetically.

Lily pulled her head up, "Great, I bet the whole hospital heard. Just what he wanted to. I wouldn't be surprised if he wasn't in his office now sending out memos that said Lily Evans screwed up."

"No."

Lily raised her eyebrows, "Huh?"

"He's not in his office, he left twenty minutes ago with the little blonde."

Lily pushed back from her desk, "I don't get it! I mean here I am doing all the work, taking the time to talk to the patients, finding out what's wrong, treating them, and then doing the paper work. Plus, fixing his mistakes. Yet he finds the time to tell me what I'm doing wrong when he's cheating on his wife?"

Julia shrugged, "I can tell you what you're doing wrong."

Lily glared at her friend, "What?"

"You're doing his work for him. If you weren't here this floor would have went to hell already and he knows it. They all know it."

"What am I supposed to do?" Lily asked with defeat.

Julia shook her head sadly, "I don't know, Lils. With men like Bolter running the show I don't think we women have a future in medicine."

Lily looked at her degree for the second time that day. She was a fighter, she always had been. She couldn't just give up because of a boss who hated her. It wasn't how she was raised and that certainly isn't how her children are going to be raised.

"How's Steve?" Lily asked changing the subject.

Julia smiled and a look flashed across her friend face, happiness, "Oh, he's great."

Lily smiled at her friend, "I'm really happy for you. You deserve it."

"Thanks, Lils," Julia said, "Listen it's Friday and we need a girls night out."

Lily groaned, "Ju, I can't."

"That's what you always say!" She said rolling her eyes, "You can't get out of this one. I called Sam and Nicole are expecting you."

"I have work," Lily replied.

"You're not scheduled for tomorrow."

"I know," She said slowly, "but I was planning on coming in and catching up on all my reports."

"No, you were planning on doing all of Bolters reports," Julia looked down at her watch, "Listen you're not getting out of this Sam and Nicole won't allow it, not again. I'll talk to you after work."

Lily nodded and watched Julia leave her office, shutting the door behind her. Lily sighed, she hadn't seen Sam and Nicole in such a long time. They were her best friends from Hogwarts. Since she had introduced them to Julia it seems they were spending more time with Julia then her. She couldn't be jealous or angry it was her own fault. She was so busy trying to make Bolter see she was a good healer that she lost track of her social life.

The rest of the day went by not getting any better. A guy came in looking for a cure for a potion he made himself. Apparently he had a date and wanted to impress the girl. He wouldn't tell Lily what he used for a whole hour until Lily told him that unless he told her what the problem was she wasn't able to help him. He finally told her he mixed Re-em blood and runespoor eggs hoping to come out looking strong and have enhanced mental abilities. The only problem was the date was a week ago and the potion wasn't wearing off. It was just getting worse. When her shift ended she almost cried with relief. She made it to Julia's front desk without seeing Bolter which she could only take as a good sign.

"Hey," Julia said grabbing her purse. They got into the lift and went down. When the door opened for the forth floor healers got on that she recognized and politely said hello. She should recognize them Bolter "lent" her out to the forth floor all the time. When they finally made it out of the building Lily sighed with relief. There was no way she was going to step back in that building until her Monday morning shift.

"I take it that means you're going to come tonight?" Julia asked eyeing her hopefully.

Lily did want to see her friends but she also just wanted a night to herself. The look on her friend's face made her give in, "Okay, I'll come."

Julia's face lit up, "Good because I was afraid that I was going to have to kidnap you tonight," She said before apparating.

Lily walked into her apartment that she shared alone. Looking at her clock she realized she didn't have much time before the girls got there. Turning on the living room light she saw a body on her couch and screamed. The sleeping body sat up startled and pulled out his wand looking around. Lily put her hand to her chest.

"Jesus, Sirius, you scared the shit out of me!"

Sirius rubbed the sleep out of his eyes and smiled, "Hey, Lily. How was work?"

Lily sighed and dropped down on the chair beside him, "Ugh, it was horrible! I was late to work so the boss from hell yelled at me. He actually accused me of not being committed to the job! He said that if I didn't get serious that he would find someone who would. Meaning he would gladly find a man to do my job for me. Like hell he would ever find a man to do the shit I do for him." Sirius smiled sympathetically.

Sirius Black was a friend from her Hogwarts days. It was really a great surprise that they even were still friends. After her split from James Potter, her ex and Sirius best friend, she expected Sirius and her to stop talking. Instead he always seemed to show up when she needed a friend the most. At Hogwarts she thought he was just as bad as James, lazy, ignorant, and a jerk. Then she started to hang out with them more and got to know them better.

"I swear if you would let me I would have killed him already," Sirius said.

Lily sighed running her hand threw her head, "Yeah I know."

She looked at the clock again, "Ugh, I'm running behind," She said.

"For what? Surely my Lily doesn't have a date? Who is he?"

"I'm going out with the girls tonight," Lily said laughing at Sirius suddenly upright posture.

"Girls? I love girls."

"Yeah I know, but you're not going," Lily said laughing, "I'm going to get in the shower. You can order a pizza if you like. I'm starving."

Sirius saluted her and she went in the direction of her room. She jumped in the shower washing the day off her. The only positive thought she had was that work could not possibly get any worse. Right?

It didn't take too long to get ready. Walking out to the living room, Sirius was grabbing a soda from the fridge. Lily opened the Pizza box and smiled. He got her favorite, sausage with black olives. She grabbed a slice and took a bite. God it was so good. Sirius started laughing at her face.

"What? I didn't get a lunch today."

"Why?"

"I didn't have time to take one. Besides I had forgotten my lunch here and I didn't have any money on me."

Sirius frowned, "you could have called me and don't you and Julia have lunch together?"

"Yeah," She said looking down. She felt like she was getting a reprimanding from her mother right now.

There was a knock on the door and Lily yelled out to them. The three girls came in laughing and stopped at the sight of Sirius.

Nicole threw her brown hair over her shoulder, "Lily you obviously have a different definition of girls night than we do."

"Hey, Sirius," Julia and Sam said.

Sam reached over Lily's shoulder and grabbed a slice of Pizza. Nicole gave her a dirty look and Sam stopped chewing.

"What?" She asked confused.

Nicole rolled her eyes and Sam just shrugged.

"Relax, Nicole, he's not coming," Lily said.

Few seconds later Nicole became warmer toward Sirius. Nicole was not the biggest fan of Sirius ever since their third year at Hogwarts. He had died her hair pink and wouldn't tell her how to change it back for a week. Sirius still laughed about it.

"Okay well, we should get going," Julia said. The three girls nodded.

"Then I'm going to get going," Sirius said giving Lily a hug.

"Bye, Sirius," The four girls yelled as he bowed out the door.

Julia had picked a muggle bar three towns away from Lily's apartment. The girls walked into packed bar, not surprised since it was a Friday night. People were drowning themselves in alcohol pushing back their work and home problems. The girls found a empty table in the back of the bar. Julia made her way to the front of the bar to get their drinks while the other three stayed at the table.

"Lily, we're so glad you came out tonight," Nicole said.

"Yeah, it seems like we see less and less of you every month," Sam said.

"Yeah, I know, I'm sorry guys. Work is just crazy." They nodded understanding, they all knew about her boss and what a jerk he was.

Julia shortly came back with their drinks. The girls spent an hour catching up with each other talking about the guys in their life or there lack of, their families, and work. They helped Nicole with the pros and cons of moving in with her serious boyfriend, Adam. Julia stuck to her argument that Nicole should just move in and get it over with. She was convinced they were going to end up getting married. Sam told Nicole to keep her freedom as long as she can. Lily pointed out that Sam was just saying that because she would have to find another roommate.

"Lily, what do you think?" Nicole asked, "Should I move in with him?"

Lily stared at her drink. She knew what Nicole was thinking. She didn't want to end up like Lily and James. James and Lily had been having problems for while before their relationship ended. They were just too busy with work. He was in training to become an auror and Lily wanted her Healer degree fast. They barley saw each other and they were under a lot of stress. The lack of sleep didn't help them at all. They fought contently. Then James asked Lily to move in with him. It seemed like a good idea to James. His argument was they could see each other a lot more but Lily didn't want to give her apartment up. She didn't want to move to fast with him. Lily looked at her friend. She could hear Nicole's real question popping in her mind, _was it worth it?_

"Do you want to move in with him?

Nicole shrugged, " Things are good right now. I finally feel like I found someone who gets me and I don't want to lose that."

"Then it sounds like you know what you want to do," Lily replied.

Sam made a sound, "Thanks, Lils, just so you know you just volunteered to help me find a new roommate."

They all laughed. After hours of dancing, more talking and defiantly a lot of drinks the girls decided it was time to head home. By the time Lily got home that night her head was spinning like crazy. She tried to walk to her bedroom with the lights off but she kept bumping in to everything. She finally got to her room and laid down in bed. Before she could even debate on weather or not to change she fell asleep.

The sun shone brightly, flooding Lily's bedroom with light. She rolled over groaning. Her head was pounding and she could hear every little noise going on outside her apartment. It didn't help that someone was in her kitchen banging around pots and pans…wait…someone was in her kitchen? She sat straight up and immediately regretting it. Putting her hand to her head she slowly got out of bed. She stood still for a moment, her body getting used to it.

Lily noticed her wand on the bedside table and grabbed it. Not that it was really going to help if someone was really in her house. She couldn't see straight and wouldn't be sure if she could aim it in the right direction. When she made it to the kitchen two men started to laugh and she was pretty sure they were laughing at her. She turned around and looked in the front room Remus and Sirius were sitting on the couch watching TV. What was it with those boys coming over unannounced?

"Morning sunshine," Sirius said laughing, "You look like hell."

"Don't you two have apartments of your own?" Lily said.

"Yeah but it's much more fun bothering you," Sirius said.

"Sirius you bother me no matter if you're here or at your place. You live across the hall!" Lily said.

"Yes well your place is cleaner," Sirius replied.

"Ugh," Lily complained putting a hand to her head, "What is wrong with you two? Banging around here like it's a zoo."

"Zoo?" Sirius said excitedly, "I wanna go to the zoo!"

Remus groaned, "Now look what you did, Lily."

"No, seriously we should go," Sirius said grinning.

It was Lily's turn to groan, "Not today Sirius."

Sirius stood up, "Nope, too late. You put the idea in my head and now we shall go!"

Remus and Lily put their head in the hands both groaning and half laughing. Sirius stood on the couch and started jumping up and down, "I wanna go! I wanna go!"

"Okay, okay, okay," Lily said holding her hands over her ears, "We'll go as long as you be quite."

Sirius grinned, "Yes!"

After a long shower, coffee and lot's of Advil Lily, Sirius and Remus made their way to the zoo. Seeing the animals got Lily feeling like a kid again. Sirius and her kept dragging Remus animal to animal. They even got into a fight about what animal was cooler, Lion or Tiger.

"Lions are better than Tigers, Sirius," Lily said like everyone would agree with her.

"Nah uh," Sirius said, "Tigers are, look at their cool stripes."

"Stripes have nothing to do with it," Lily argued, "Lions are the king of the cats."

Sirius stuck out his tong at Lily who did the same. Remus rolled his eyes, "You two are like children."

"Yeah, just see how children like we can be!" Sirius said.

Lily jumped on Sirius back and Sirius took off with her. Lily was half laughing half screaming, Sirius did not know how to steer his own body. Sirius looked to his right and crashed into someone. When they saw who it was Sirius dropped Lily who landed on her butt.

"Sirius!" Lily yelled.

She looked up and her heart dropped, James Potter, was standing there with a blond who was hanging on his arm. Lily's heart dropped. This was the last place she expected to see him. Everything seemed to slow down. It seemed like forever until Remus finally caught up to them and froze. This was not going to be a happy meeting at all.

Remus gabbed Lily's hand and helped her up, she gave him a small smile, "Thanks."

"Hello, James," Remus said.

James just stared at him then at Lily then at Sirius and back at Lily.

Lily didn't know what to say the last time she saw him was the night he broke up with her. A night she didn't want to remember. The only thing she could say was, "Hello."

"You said you were going to your uncles house," James said staring accusingly at Remus.

"I was, I mean I did. He wasn't home," Remus said, "When I got back Sirius was at my house, then we went over to Lily's and then Sirius wanted to go to the zoo."

Something was going on. Lily could tell because Remus rarely got nervous like this. He was over talking. Lily noticed the blonde staring at her and it was starting to make her uncomfortable. She didn't even know the girl and yet the girl was glaring at her like she made fun of her shoes. Speaking of which the girl was way to dressed up for the zoo. Her blonde hair was pined back, not a single hair was out of place. Her clothes matched perfectly to her shoes. It made Lily depressed, the girl was perfect. She also noticed Sirius and Remus were giving the girl dirty looks.

"Baby, who are your friends?" The blonde asked still looking at Lily.

"Er, right. You remember Sirius and Remus," James said, he pointed at Lily, "This is Lily Evans…an old friend from school."

Lily couldn't take anymore of it, "Exuse me, I'm going to get a drink," Lily said pointing over to the little zoo restaurant over in the corner. Remus and Sirius nodded.

Lily walked off leaving them to talk. Whatever was going on Lily wasn't so sure she wanted to be involved. She wasn't sure if she ever wanted to go back to a zoo again. Why was it that when she was finally having fun or finally had her life together James Potter had to go and ruin it. Until now it was just his memory that haunted her. Sirius and Remus entered five minutes later with grim faces. They were talking in low voices while they walked over to where she was sitting.

"So," Lily said watching Sirius steal her fries.

"So?" Sirius said with his mouth full.

"That's disgusting, Sirius," Remus said.

"What was that all about?" Lily asked.

Remus and Sirius gave each other looks. Remus nodded to Sirius.

"We haven't exactly talked with James for a while now," Sirius said, "Well I haven't."

"Why?" Lily asked confused and shocked. James and Sirius had been inseparable since their first year at Hogwarts. Lily didn't even know it was possible to even get them apart for a few hours.

"Well four months after you two broke up James started to see the bitch from hell-"

"Jessica," Remus interrupted.

"Yeah, whatever," Sirius said continuing, "Two months after they started going out she started to spend all his money. Taking up all his time. She told him she didn't want him talking to me anymore!"

"What?" Lily asked dropping a fry.

"Yeah, James told me that I couldn't come over as much because of her. I told him to tell her to shove it. But ever since you guys broke up the guy just doesn't care anymore. He's so brainwashed by the bitch he doesn't realize what's going on."

"So you don't talk because she told him not to talk to you anymore?" Lily asked.

"Not exactly," Remus said, "Sirius freaked out when James told him this and they got into a row. He called Jessica some pretty nasty things. James took it badly and told Sirius he wasn't welcome at his house if he was going to talk to his girlfriend like that."

"I haven't talken to him since," Sirius said, "Well until today that is."

Lily was still confused, "Why was she acting like she didn't know you guys then?"

Sirius growled, "Because that's her way of being a bitch. Acting like we are worth remembering or something."

Remus shook his head, "I think it had more to do with you, Lily."

Sirius and Lily looked at him, "What?"

"I'm serious, she made the comment while looking at Lily. It was her way of finding out who you were without seeming like she was jealous."

"Why would she be jealous?"

"Because we like you and not her," Sirius said.

Lily looked out the restaurant window thinking about everything, "We should go."

They nodded. Ten minutes later they were saying goodbye to Lily and making their way back to Remus' house.

Sirius sat on the couch sighing, "He lied."

Remus sat down next to him, "What?"

"He lied, about Lily."

Remus nodded, "What did you expect? Honey, this is Lily Evans the love of my life that I let go because I'm to stubborn to see that I really do need her."

"No but I didn't think he would be that heartless to blow Lily off like she was nothing to him."

"I'm not surprised. Jessica would have flipped if she knew about Lily."

"What could she do? She already took James from us," Sirius said.

Okay so that's the first chapter. I already wrote the second chapter out but I won't post it until the third one is written. Please tell me what you think, if it's even worth finishing or any ideas you have for the plot. I have a general idea of what's going to happen but I might consider your ideas if they're good: ) So please review!


	2. Chapter 2

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Harry Potter.

Lily sat back in her office chair and sighed. For the past two hours she was trying to make sense of a patients file. Bolter's notes made no sense at all. Lily was surprised that the guy even graduated from school. Julia was right; she had no one to blame but herself. She was always picking up after him and fixing his mistakes.

Lily grabbed her quill again and dropped it with surprise as an owl flew through the window. She eyed Nicole's owl, not wanting to open it. A week ago Sirius and his big mouth told Nicole and Sam that they ran into James. Since then Nicole and Sam have been showing up at her house and owling her like crazy. The just didn't get that she was okay.

Sophia, the owl, started hooting. Lily grabbed the letter and patted Sophia on the head and watched her fly out the window. Sighing she opened it.

_Lily,_

_ We need to talk! Stop trying to ignore Sam and __I__! You hadn't seen James for over a year since it happened. So please forgive us for being worried. _

That was just like her friends, always worrying when there was nothing to worry about.

_Anyway, I wanted you to come over and see my new place with Adam. We wanted to have a dinner with all our friends. You can bring Sirius if you'd like…but he better be nice to Adam or I'll rip his…you know off…_

_Nicole_

Lily couldn't help but laugh. She did not know how Sirius managed to make Nicole hate him. She knew something had happened between them but Nicole never said. Whenever someone had asked her why she hated him she said that she would never forgive him for turning her hair pink. Lily couldn't believe anyone really bought the excuse.

Lily put the letter in her desk drawer and grabbed her quill once again. If she was going to go to Nicole's tonight then she had to fix the patients report and find out what was really wrong. No staying late tonight. _Though, I could use it as an excuse not to go_, she thought. She immediately shook the thought from her mind. Nicole would kill her and she needed to be there for her friend. She was thrilled that Nicole was happy and in love.

A knock on her office door detracted Lily once again from her patients file. She looked up to see Julia slide in. She looked at her clock to see it was lunch time. She sighed inwardly, thinking she would never get her work done.

"Hey," Julia said sitting down.

"Hey."

"Ugh, I swear I have never been more aggravated than I am today. The patients that come here can be so aggravating. How hard is it to read a sign?"

Lily laughed and shook her head. Sometimes Julia could be unbelievable, "They come here for our help, Ju."

Julia sighed and Lily could tell something was wrong, "Are you okay?" She asked concerned.

Julia bit into her sandwich. Lily waited till she was done chewing it, "Yeah, I mean, I don't know. It's just that I didn't really think that I'd be here."

Lily frowned, "It's Wednesday where else would you be?"

"No, I mean at this point in my life I still don't know what I'm doing. I never wanted to work here, you know that."

Lily nodded, she was always aware that Julia was not happy working at the hospital and if you really knew Julia you knew that she didn't belong behind a desk, "You have to figure out what you what want. Do you want to be working at the front desk of St. Mungos for the rest of your life?"

"Hell no," Julia replied.

"Then you gotta take action."

Julia smiled then tilted her head sideways, "What about you?"

"Uh?" Lily said confused.

"Do you want to be working for Bolter for the rest of your life?"

"I won't be, he'll die before me," Lily joked.

"I'm serious," Julia said.

Lily was about to make an old joke but didn't when Julia narrowed her eyes, knowing what she was thinking.

"Okay, no I don't but what am I supposed to do? I didn't work this hard to quit! We've had this conversation before, Ju. I can't just give up. I've lost a lot to this job," She immediately regretted her choice of words and really couldn't believe they came out of her mouth.

Julia looked up from her sandwich, "You know, I'm here if you need me. To talk, I mean." Lily nodded, apparently Sam and Nicole also had big mouths, "I'm just tired of everyone treating my like I'm fragile or something like it just happened yesterday."

"Yeah I get it," Julia nodded understandingly.

"Thanks," Lily said. That's what she loved about Julia she was always there for you but not in an overbearingly mother way, like a friend should be. Sam and Nicole were too much like sisters to just let it be but Lily also needed that in her life; she just was too stubborn to admit it.

"Lily!" Nicole yelled hugging her tightly, "I'm so happy that you came!"

"Of course I came!" Lily said.

Nicole smiled and then looked at Sirius, "Hey Sirius."

Sirius was a little taken aback my Nicole's niceness, "Er, hey."

"Come on in," Nicole said, shutting the door behind them.

Lily and Sirius followed Nicole into the living room where everyone else was talking before dinner. Sam smiled when she saw Lily and got up to say hello. Nicole excused herself to go see how the food was coming.

"I'll go with you," Lily said leaving Sam and Sirius too talk. She wasn't worried; they always got along pretty well.

When they were alone in the kitchen Nicole said, "I wasn't sure if you were going to come or not."

"What? Why not?" Lily asked surprised.

"Well, you've been ignoring Sam and me for the past week! I thought you were going to use work as an excuse or something."

Lily felt a little guilty at her earlier thoughts, "I would never do that. This is important to you, Nicole. You're always here for me when I need you and I'm always going to be here when you need me."

Nicole looked over the pot and smiled, "Thanks. I mean I would have understood if you didn't want to come. It probably hurts."

Lily really didn't get why her friends always assumed that James broke up with her because she didn't want to move in with him. It was probably because she never told them the whole story. She thought her friends would have been smart enough to realize that there had to be more to the story. It never accord to her that they knew there was more to the story but knew Lily wanted to keep it to herself.

Later that night when they were all sitting in the dinner room that had been charmed to fit them all, Julia nudged Lily in the arm and pointed to Sirius and Sam who were on the right of Lily. Lily turned and smiled Sam and Sirius were whispering and smiling. Lily looked back at Julia and grinned.

"That can't be good," Julia whispered.

"No it can't," She agreed.

"What's wrong?" Julia asked.

"Well I don't need Sam hating Sirius too," Lily whispered back.

Julia thought for a moment, "I don't really think that Nicole hates him. To me she always seemed like she's angry at him."

"Really?" Lily said surprised.

Julia nodded and opened her mouth but Nicole interrupted her, "Hey, what are you four over there whispering about?"

Julia, Lily, Sirius, and Sam looked up guilty, "Nothing," They said at the same time and then busted out in laughter at the same time.

The rest of the dinner they talked about Hogwarts times and shared stories. Adam and his friends went to Durmstrang Institute. Lily didn't fully trust them but Adam seemed like a good guy and he was great to Nicole.

After dinner Lily and Sirius were the last to go. Nicole had once again gone back to her old attitude towards Sirius and Lily wasn't exactly sure why. She was great to him up until dinner. Then she remembered what Julia had said but couldn't quite understand why Nicole would be angry with Sirius. Could she really keep a grudge for so many years?

"Jamie!"

James cringed at the nickname Jessica called him. It wasn't her fault; he never told her how much he hated it. In fact he usually kept his dislikes to himself because if he was honest with himself, she was a walking list of his dislikes. But he pushed it all down deep and convinced himself he was in love with her.

"Yeah?" He asked.

"What do you think?" She asked holding up a red dress than black one.

They were at a dress shop downtown shopping for a dress for the upcoming Auror's ball. He tired to get out of it telling her to take one of her girlfriends but she wouldn't hear of it.

"The black one," James replied, not really caring what she wore.

Jessica looked in the mirror again and stared at herself with each of the dresses, "I think I'll go with the red one," She said.

James rolled his eyes. He wasn't sure why she brought him shopping with her. Anytime he told her to go with one thing she'd go with the other. Women were an absolute mystery to him. No matter how many times she said his opinion matter to her he didn't believe it.

"Can we go now?" James asked.

A look of annoyance flashed across her face but it was gone within seconds replaced by something else. He wasn't sure what, "Jamie, are you sure this red dress looks good on me?" She asked sweetly.

A look of confusion spread across his face. He wasn't sure what just happened, "Uh, you never tried it on."

She smiled, "Oh, of course. Let me try it on for you," She said but she was looking over his head at someone else.

She walked into the dressing room and James turned to see what she was staring at. He almost fell when he saw who is was…Sirius and Lily…again! _Shit._ Why was he running into them everywhere all the sudden? They were staring back at him. Sirius was narrowing his eyes at the dressing room and suddenly James knew why Jessica's attitude changed within seconds. Lily was just staring in shock, just as surprised to see him as he was of her.

Sirius grabbed on to Lily's elbow and gentle brought her away from James and over to a rack of dresses.

James sat down on a chair waiting for Jessica to come out but secretly watching Lily and Sirius in the corner of his eye. When Jessica came out she cleared her throat obviously annoyed that James was not anxiously waiting for her to come out. He looked up at her and she smiled.

"What do you think?" She said a little too loudly.

James sighed, "You look great!"

Truthfully though it was a little bit showy. It showed a little too much skin for an Auror's ball but he wasn't going to tell her that. It was only going to start a fight that he didn't want to get into.

She smiled brightly, "Thank you, Jamie."

Over by the rack Sirius was seething. He couldn't believe that James and the bitch from hell were actually there. He silently cursed himself for bring Lily again to a place were James and Jessica were. He couldn't believe his luck in the past two weeks. It was getting to be very difficult to move on with his life when his ex-best friend was contently popping up everywhere. Lily gave him a small smile and he knew that she didn't blame him but that was Lily. Sirius didn't understand how James could have broken up with her. She was such a great person.

"Thank you, Jamie!"

Sirius heard Jessica practically yell. He rolled his eyes not believing that James was still letting her call him that. It was crazy the way James had just given up.

"What do you think about this?" Sirius asked holding up a green dress, "It'll bring out your eyes."

Lily laughed, "Sirius you're such a girl," She teased.

"Oh just wait till we get to your shoes!" Sirius gushed in his best girly voice, "You are just going to look fantastic!"

Lily kept laughing and then pulled out a blue dress, "Well this one would look absolutely gorgeous on you!"

"You think?" He asked sighing, "It won't make my butt look to big?"

Lily couldn't stop laughing and which made Sirius laugh along with her. He was happy to see her smiling. After they calmed down Sirius got serious, "Thank you for going with me."

Lily smiled, "Uh?"

"To the auror ball. I thought I was going to have to go by myself."

She giggled, "Sirius you could get any girl to go with you!"

Sirius nodded his head, "True."

"Wow, not that you're conceited or anything!" Lily said smiling.

For the next half hour Sirius pulled dresses off the rack while Lily tried them on. In the end she decided on a plain black one. She was actually quite happy with it. It has a halter top and it went all the way to her ankles. It made it easy to find shoes to match.

Remus crashed on Lily's couch laughing, "Lily, I cannot believe that you got Sirius to go shopping with you!"

Lily laughed, "Well in my opinion, Sirius got me to go shopping with him!"

"UH! Well excuse me for wanting my date for the night to look perfect! You know people expect a lot from me," Sirius said joking.

Lily shook her head pityingly, "Sirius, I am way too good for you. No matter how well you dress people will see it."

Remus and Lily laughed and Sirius pouted, "I wanted to be too good for you."

"Please, Sirius, you're embarrassing yourself," Remus said laughing.

Lily shook her head and picked up the empty bottles on her coffee table, "How is it we only hang out at my place?"

Sirius grinned, "we've been through this my place is too messy."

"It's called cleaning," Lily said throwing the bottles away.

Sirius scrunched his face up pretending to think, "Cleaning…hum…where have I heard that from?"

Lily laughed, "You're an idiot!"

"Yes well it wasn't like I purposely didn't tell you," Lily said the next day.

For the past twenty minutes now Julia was giving Lily hell for not mentioning running into James for the past week. Lily did not want to go through this with Julia. After Nicole, Sam, and Sirius she had reached her quota for over talked conversations already. She didn't even know why Julia was so upset. She and James only met once and it was a little over a year ago. As far as she could remember they talked for about a minute.

She didn't really want to admit that running into James for a second time caught her off guard but she was being to realize that she couldn't run from him forever and she didn't want to feel uncomfortable every time they ran into each other. She felt like an idiot every time they did. He was always with perfect Jessica. Lily didn't usually like to judge people before she met them but after everything Sirius had told her about that woman Lily really disliked her.

"That's not the point, Lily," Julia said, "I'm just worried about you."

"Ugh, you shouldn't be worried. If I was sitting here crying or moping about James then yeah I would hope you'd be worried but I'm fine. In fact I'm great!"

Julia gave a Lily a face that said, "Oh yeah?"

"Okay, I could do with a vacation and yeah my boss sucks but other than that I'm happy."

"Lily, you need to get out more," Julia said her eyes lighting up; "You know there's this cute bartender at one of the bars I go to! You guys would totally hit it off!"

Lily rolled her eyes and laughed, "Really? You know this because he's cute?"

"No! I've actually had conversations with him. He was trying to get me to go out with him but I'm with Steve," Julia said smiling.

"Oh, thanks, send me your rejects," Lily said laughing.

Julia laughed along, "If he were a true reject I wouldn't be trying to set you up with him but really you guys would get along."

Lily stared at her do to list on her desk. She wasn't really reading it but it was giving her time to think about this. She hadn't really dated in a long time and to start all over was a scary thing.

"Please, Lils! Listen you won't even have to go out with him. Let's just stop over by the bar and you can check him out for yourself," Julia pleaded.

"Okay, okay," Lily said, "How about after the weekend?"

"Sure, why after?" Julia asked, "Your not planning on working are you?"

Lily smiled, "Well actually yes but I have the auror's ball to go to Saturday."

"Why are you going to that?" Julia asked.

"Because Sirius begged me to go and he's my friend."

Julia shook her head at her friend, "Well, that should be interesting," Julia said.

"You have no idea," Lily said nodding.

Okay there is the second chapter! It was kinds slow but I promise the next chapter will be better! Thank you so much to those who reviewed my first chapter! You guys really got me to update quicker! I hope you liked it. The auror's ball is coming up and there will be some face to face run ins with Lily and James!

Thanks and please review!


	3. Chapter 3

Lily sat on her couch sipping on red wine staring at the blank TV screen. It was one of those rare occasions that she was alone. She could finally think freely without her friends putting their input. As much as she loved her friends she got a little overwhelmed by their consent comments about how she was living her life. She was exactly happy with her life but she wasn't exactly sad about it either.

She was amused that Julia thought that introducing her to some guy would make everything better. Lily wasn't sure why she agreed to meeting Julia's friend. She wasn't prepared to open herself up again and she didn't want to. She didn't have time for a boyfriend and learning from her past she knew that that's exactly what she needed, time. She was stupid for agreeing. She knew that but what was she supposed to say? She couldn't even come up with an excuse when she was just sitting there.

Seeing James again really screwed her up. She realized that she had to get over it and soon. She was an adult and shouldn't be getting so rattled every time she ran into an ex boyfriend.

_But he wasn't just some ex-boyfriend; _she thought and immediately erased the thought from her brain. It wouldn't be so bad running into him if that blonde wasn't always standing next to him flaunting her perfect body and perfect hair. Who was really that perfect anyway?

She shook her head of her thoughts and flipped on the TV. She was tired of thinking about James. She wasn't about to bring up old habits. She sighed; she didn't realize how lonely she was without her friends. She laughed at herself for being so stupid. Just a second ago she was happy to have time alone.

"God I'm pathetic," She said to herself.

"Huh?'"

Lily looked up surprised to see Remus standing there, "Oh, I didn't realize you were standing there."

"So I gathered," Remus said smiling. She watched him grab a wine glass and pore some wine for himself, "So what you doing here talking to yourself when you could be out talking to actual people?"

"The question is what are you doing here?" Lily asked avoiding the question. She really had no where else to go other than work which made her feel like a complete loser.

Remus laughed, "Avoiding the question are we? Well, Sirius and Sam have a date tonight," He said, "And I'm pretty sure that Nicole and Adam are spending a quite night by themselves. So that leaves you and me to fend for ourselves."

"Sirius and Sam have a date?" Lily asked.

Remus frowned, "You didn't know?"

Lily shook her head, "Nope. Well I hope to god he doesn't mess it up for his own good. If Sam starts hating him to I don't know what I'll do."

"Yes well Sam could do some damage herself," Remus replied.

Lily nodded in agreement.

"So what are you watching?" He asked.

"Uh, I don't know. I wasn't really watching. I just turned it on for some noise. I didn't realize how quite it was without you or Sirius over."

Remus nodded, "That's why I came over. Peter has been disappearing a lot and it's weird being in our place alone."

"I'll never understand why you chose to share an apartment with him," Lily said thinking about the weird little guy. He was so strange and he scared Lily a little bit, she wasn't sure why.

Remus shrugged, "Have you tried sharing an apartment with Sirius?"

"No but neither have you," Lily pointed out.

"And I never will." They both laughed.

It was a nice night for Lily just sitting there with Remus talking. She forgot all about her problems at work and her running into James. She was tired of thinking about the perky little blonde who was always around him. Jealousy was not something she had but she couldn't get over the fact that James could open himself up to another relationship. Why was everything so unfair?

James rolled off Jessica feeling very empty. Jessica hopped out of bed revealing her naked body and he watched her walk over to the bathroom. He didn't understand how he got here. For the past few days all he could think of was Lily. He tried to shake the thoughts of her out of his head but it didn't work. No matter what he was doing or talking to the red head popped into his mind. It made him feel dirty thinking of her while he was with Jessica but he couldn't control it. It killed him every time he saw her laughing. God what was wrong with him? If Jessica could read thoughts he would be one dead man.

He heard the shower turn on and decided that he should get up. He was meeting up with Remus later on and he didn't want to be late. He had a lot on his mind and Remus was the only one who he could talk to. Thinking about Remus made him think about Sirius and how much he missed his missed friend. James really wanted to talk to him but he couldn't. Even when they were still talking Sirius would always point out that James had nothing to complain about because he was the one who let Lily go and he was right. He was the one to break it off but they didn't know the whole story. No one did but Lily and James and that's how it would remain. He was curious to why Lily had no yet spilled about their past relationship and why they really spilt. He sighed; he didn't want to think about this anymore.

James slowly got up and changed into some clothes. As much as he wanted to take a shower he wanted to get out of their more. He hated going over to Jessica's place but he couldn't ever bring himself to actually sleep with her in his bed, sometimes he couldn't even stand to sleep in it.

After writing a quick note to Jessica he grabbed his wand and apparated to Diagon Ally. He got to the Leaky Cauldron early. Tom a young guy stood behind the counter serving drinks, James gave him a nod and ordered a drink. He needed one because his thoughts had right back to Lily. He put his head in his hands and sighed. What was wrong with him, he shouldn't be thinking about an ex girlfriend like this. Especially since he had a girlfriend who loved him. It wasn't fair to her.

"Hey," A familiar voice said.

James looked up and saw Remus smiling down at him. Remus nodded over to one of the tables and James got up and followed him. Once they sat down Remus said, "God you look like hell."

James smiled at his old friend, "Yeah well I haven't been getting much sleep lately."

Remus nodded like he understood. Could he really understand though? Was it written all over his face?

"I've heard," Remus said.

James nodded, "It's no big deal."

Remus looked at him and gave him a "yeah sure" look, "That's why you asked me to meet you for lunch right? Because it was no big deal?"

James laughed, "Well I have to admit that seeing her and Sirius was a bit shocking, then seeing them at that dress store."

"Yeah well you better get used to it," Remus said.

"What why?" James asked looking up from his glass.

"Because you'll be seeing them at the Auror's ball," Remus said like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

James silently cursed; he had forgotten about the ball and had totally forgotten that Sirius was an auror. Surprisingly they barley ran into each other at work but James had always taken it a little bit more serious than Sirius. They both brought their work home with them when they could. Their offices used to be next to each others but after the big fight Sirius moved his on the other side of the office. It was a big slap in the face for James.

"Wait, why would I be seeing Lily there? She's not an auror?" James said.

"No but she's going with one," Remus said secretively.

"She's dating an auror?" James asked shocked.

Remus opened his mouth but an owl came flying in through the window next to James.

"Looks like a ministry owl," James said grabbing the letter. The owl flew off.

Remus watched James read the letter, "Well she's not-" But James cut him off and said, "Shit, I've gotta go Remus. I'll talk to you later."

Remus helplessly watched James run off and knew right then that he just made things ten times worse. He needed to talk to Sirius and fast.

Lily stared at herself in the mirror ignoring her best friend's comments. They had come over earlier to help her get ready for the ball despite her protests. She didn't think it was really a big deal; it wasn't like she was trying to impress anybody. It was Sirius for crying out loud. She was doing it as a favor.

"Whatever, Sam, I think she looks gorgeous," Nicole said, "Even if it's with that prat."

Lily rolled her eyes lately she noticed Nicole was getting a little meaner when insulting Sirius and she had no idea why. Then again it was Nicole and she didn't need a reason to be rude to Sirius.

"I'm just saying that I think the dress is a little plain," Sam said rolling her eyes at Nicole's comment.

Lily let the comment slide because she knew Sam was a little jealous. No matter how many times Lily said that she was going with Sirius as a friend Sam was still a little cold towards her. It worried Lily how attached Sam was becoming of Sirius and so fast. Sirius wasn't a guy that could hold down a relationship with a woman and it was only a matter of time before Sirius got bored.

"Jesus Sam! Lay off!" Nicole said.

Lily turned around and realized she had missed something. She looked from Sam to Nicole and they were staring at each other with anger. She had never seen them look at each other like that.

"Did I just miss something? What the hell is going on?" Lily asked.

"Nothing, Lily! Sorry that you were too busy daydreaming about your date!" Sam snapped and walked out of her room.

Lily's face fell and she looked hurt. Nicole gave her a smile and hugged her, "Don't worry Lily she's just JEALOUS," She said the last word loud so Sam heard it while she was slamming the front door.

Nicole rolled her eyes, "You're going to have so much fun with Sirius. I went once with Nathan," Nathan was Nicole's ex and an Auror, "it was pretty boring but once Sirius showed up he started to dance and well…it was hilarious."

It was the first time that Nicole had said something nice about Sirius. Well as nice as she could get. Lily smiled, "You know that we're just friends right? I mean I'm so not into Sirius like that."

Nicole laughed and Sirius said from the door, "Damn and hear I was thinking that you were falling for my charm!" Lily and Nicole looked at Sirius and both rolled their eyes.

"You two have fun," Nicole said leaving.

After she left Sirius looked at her in confusion, "Am I missing something or was she just actually nice for a change?"

Lily shrugged, "Well there was an unpleasant exchange between Sam and Nicole a couple minutes before you got here."

"Yeah? Is that what that door slamming was?" Sirius asked.

"Yeah, that was Sam."

"What the hell happened?" He asked concerned.

"Well I'm not exactly sure," Lily confessed, "I was sort of out of it. Then all the sudden Sam was really angry at Nicole, snapped at me and then left."

Sirius was quite for a moment, "Well, there's no reason for that to ruin your night. She'll come around."

Lily nodded, "Alright, let's get out of here!"

James stood pacing the floor waiting for Jessica to finish getting ready. They were already a half hour late and he was getting annoyed. He wanted to get there already. He didn't understand why it took women so long to get ready, was all that stuff really necessary? When he went into the bathroom ten minutes ago he felt like she was going in slow motion. When they first started going out he liked that she made an effort but now he just wanted to burn all her makeup and lotions.

Five minutes later he heard her coming down the hall very slowly. He sighed, _finally_. When he saw her he smiled. She was wearing the dress she tried on in the store which made him think of Lily. He frowned, he was in serious trouble.

"What?" Jessica asked looking down at her dress, "Don't I look all right?"

He walked over to her and threw his arms around her. He looked down and grinned, "Of course you do. You look beautiful. Everyone is going to be in love with you tonight."

She smiled, "Thank you."

Jessica put her arm in through James' and he apparated them away.

Remus couldn't believe that Sirius and Lily had already left. He thought he left in enough time but judging by the empty apartments he was wrong. Earlier he tried to contact James but every time the owl would come back and Remus could only take that as James was in the middle of official Auror business. He should have said something to them both days ago but he didn't want to bring the conversation of James up, it was a sore subject for both of them at the moment.

He paced Lily's apartment and thought. He couldn't possibly show up to the ball. He wouldn't even get in and he couldn't just stand there until Lily, Sirius or James came out. Once James saw Sirius and Lily together he would assume that they were together especially after their conversation. He had no choice but to go home and hope that there were so many aurors they wouldn't see each other.

Okay I know that I said that the Ball was going to be in this chapter but I lied. I was going to put part of it in here but it's a pretty long part so I decided to just make it a separate one. I know it's a kinds boring chapter but I was having a hard time making it flow. I had a lot of ideas but whenever I would write it out it kind of sounded bad. Hopefully you'll stick with me! I promise the ball is next and it's going to be longer than this one. So far this is my shortest chapter and hopefully it'll stay that way. Thank you to all who have reviewed the first and second chapters you guys are awesome!

Oh and grammar and spelling is probably pretty bad in this one. Sorry!


	4. Chapter 4

Hey guys! I know that it's seriously been forever! Don't hate me but my friend finally had her baby a week ago and I've been over there with her. He's the cutest little thing ever!

DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN HARRY POTTER…I hate these things.

Lily stood outside a five story white building standing next to Sirius. He was politely making small talk with a top auror's wife. Lily looked around and was impressed with the view. There were beautiful flowers lining the pathway up to the stairs. White Christmas lights were wrapped around the trees lighting up the area.

Sirius grabbed hold of Lily arm and led her up the stairs and to the entrance. Sirius chuckled when Lily lost her footing because she was too busy looking at the flowers. He held her arm tighter and helped her slip back on her shoe. They walked into the entrance and Lily was careful to watch where she was walking as she looked around. They walked into a big hallway with many doors leading off to rooms. A man in a black dress robe stood at the door getting the guests coats. Lily slipped off her sweater; a coat really was not necessary since the weather was so warm.

She followed Sirius and the other aurors into the grand ballroom, red rose's filled gold vases all around the room. A huge chandler hung from the ceiling in the middle of the room, and underneath was a huge dance floor. Waiters in the same black dress robes as the coat check man walked around, some of them were carrying little appetizers. Lily noticed that more and more people started to fill the room making her a little nervous.

"Hey Frank," Sirius said, "I thought you were on duty tonight?"

Lily turned to face Sirius and realized he was talking to Frank Longbottom. Lily remembered him from her Hogwarts days. He was the head boy in her fifth year when she was a prefect. They used to patrol the corridors together when no one else wanted to.

"Yeah, I am but not for a couple hours. I thought I'd stop by," Frank said.

Sirius nodded, "Is Alice around?"

Frank nodded, "Yeah," He noticed Lily and smiled, "Lily Evans! I have not seen you in years and you are just as pretty as ever. Do not tell my wife hear I said that. How are you?"

Lily smiled, "I'm great. How are you?"

Frank nodded, "Not bad." He looked down, looking back up he eyed the two of them, and "You two are together?"

Lily and Sirius laughed and said, "N-"

"Frank, there you are. I swear I'm going to need to put a tracking device on you!" His wife Alice came hurrying over.

"Sorry dear, I was just talking with Lily and Sirius."

"Lily!" Alice said, "It's so nice seeing you again!"

"Thank you, you as well."

Alice eyed the two of them the same way Frank did, "I didn't know you two were together."

"Oh, no we aren't. We're just friends," Lily said.

"Oh," Alice said looking down at Sirius arm that was still wrapped around Lily's.

Sirius pulled away clearing his throat, "So…"

Two seconds later, a man with brown hair walked up to Sirius and Frank and clapped them on the shoulders. The three men all exchanged greetings while Alice and Lily carried on a conversation about their own jobs. It seemed like more men started to join their group and Sirius introduced them all to Lily as they came up. She could not help but notice how they were staring at her. She tried not to squirm under their gazes but it was becoming hard. Even though they were talking to Sirius, they all were staring at her. _Is there something in my teeth? No, there couldn't be I haven't eaten anything since we left…maybe something's in my hair? _She tried to ignore it thinking that maybe it was because she was a new face.

Sirius started a conversation about some case that was going on and Lily tuned out. The man with the brown hair commented on the latest breaking news in the case. Sirius took this opportunity to lean over to Alice and whisper something in her ear. Alice caught her eye, rolled her eyes, and smiled. She grabbed Lily's arm, "Want to go find some drinks?"

Lily nodded her head grateful, "Yes, please."

As hey walked over to a long table with flutes of champagne Lily could feel their stares on her back "Don't let them get to you. Trust me there are going to be a whole lot of them trying to star down your dress tonight."

"Do they do that to every girl?" Lily asked grabbing a champagne glass.

"To all the under twenty five year old women who aren't with their husbands," Alice said.

Lily looked around and found that the party was hardly lacking beautiful women. In fact, she felt dressed down in compared to them. All of them were dazzling with jewelry and fancy dresses. She rather felt stupid for picking a simple dress.

"Sirius looks to be on his best behavior tonight. I am actually surprised that he asked me to get you away from them instead of just punching them in the face. He was very violent at Hogwarts," Alice said, "You must have some affect on him."

Lily almost choked on her drink, "What? No, we really aren't together. He's just a good friend. He helped me through some pretty rough times."

Alice gave her a blank look and Lily couldn't tell what she was thinking. She could not actually believe that anyone would think Lily and Sirius were together. He was like her brother; it rather disgusted her a little bit.

"It's your business," Alice said, "I can understand."

Once again, Lily was confused, "What can you understand?"

"Well that you guys are keeping your relationship a secret, I mean with James Potter being here and all," Alice said, "Frank told me how Sirius and James don't talk anymore. It is only natural not to want to add fuel to the fire. You are not the type of girl to date a person's ex-best friend for revenge so I do not think that is what you want to do. Don't worry though I won't say anything."

Lily's ears were ringing, "Wait…James…he's here?"

"Uh, yeah, he is an auror. I mean you knew that right. I have not seen him or Jessica yet but I'm sure he'll show up. Jessica will use any excuse to dress up and be the center off attention," Alice said rolling her eyes. Then in a whisper added, "She's not the nicest girl in the world but James seems to love her."

Lily almost groaned; she couldn't believe her luck, how could she not remember that James was an auror? She swallowed the rest of her champagne and grabbed another one. She tried to keep up with what Alice was saying. She was telling her about past balls but Lily was too busy thinking about James and Jessica. Sirius couldn't have possibly brought her here thinking that they would run into James. _I have to find Sirius._

James stood staring at Lily and Alice talking, many thoughts ran through his head. When he first walked in with Jessica, she was standing with Sirius and a bunch of the guys from work. He couldn't figure out which one she was with and it was driving him mad but he was trying to tell himself he was only concerned for her. He studied her face, there was something there. Fear? Worry? Shock? He couldn't contemplate it for much longer because a friend of his slapped him on the shoulder.

"Hey," Mark said.

"Hey."

"Didn't think you'd show."

James raised his eyebrow, "Did you forget who I'm dating?"

Mark laughed, "No but you were later than usual so I thought that you got off the hook. Speaking of which, where is she?"

"I don't know, the boss took her for a dance a while ago and she hasn't come back," James looked around at the dancing couples and the chatting aurors, "Man I hate these things. My parents used to make me come when I was younger."

"Yeah?"

"This one time Sirius and I got really bored so we turned all the ladies hair green. You should have seen the look on my mother's face, she was so pissed," James said laughing. He stomach gave a slight pang at the mention of Sirius but he ignored it.

Mark laughed, "Too bad we can't do anything like that now, anything to liven up this party."

James nodded, "Yea-"

He felt his heart drop. Sirius was leading Lily out to the dance floor.

_Their just friends…maybe he's just having a dance with her…_

"Uh, you okay, James?" Mark asked.

"Huh?" James said, "Oh yeah…fine."

"Okay. Listen gotta go find Mary. She'll kill me if I leave her over there with those women."

Those women were what they called the old auror's wives. James nodded not paying attention. He was watching Lily and Sirius. He was waiting for the song to end so he could see who her date was but when the song ended, they didn't let go of each other…they kept dancing! He watched for five more minutes before Jessica came over annoyed.

"Where were you?" Jessica asked in a huff, "I was trying to get your attention! Your boss would not let me go! I swear I think he felt me up to!"

James chuckled a little, "What do you want me to do kick his ass?"

She narrowed her eyes, "James, It's not funny. Are you going to do anything at all?"

James stared at her. Was she being serious? By the looks on her face, she was, "He's my boss, Jess. I can't go over there and punch him on the face."

"Whatever. Are you going to ask me to dance?"

He was about to say no but then stopped himself. She would kill him. So he grabbed her hand and led her out on to the dance floor. He tried to stay a good distance from Sirius and Lily. He still wanted to figure out whom Lily was with. He was sure that if she were coming with Sirius Remus would have said something.

"Hey, James, Jessica," A woman's voice said.

He turned to his right where Frank and Alice were. James stopped dancing and loosened his hold on Jessica. Frank nodded over to a nearby table.

"I'm going to get some drinks. What would you guys like?" Alice asked.

"I'll go with you," James asked remembering that Alice was talking to Lily earlier.

Alice smiled, "Great."

They walked slowly over to the bartender. Saying hello to the people they passed.

"So?" Alice asked once they got at the bar.

"Uh, So what?" James asked while they were waiting for their turn.

Alice gave a little knowing smile, "I'm not an idiot."

"Uh, good to know," He said confused.

Alice rolled her eyes, "I saw you staring at Lily the whole time we were talking."

His eyes grew big, was he that obvious?

Alice laughed, "Don't worry, she didn't see you. But she was always like that. At school, she was never aware of her beauty either. Some things just don't change." That last sentence James had a feeling was aimed at him. He choose to ignore it.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Please, James. You were staring at her the whole time you were dancing with Jessica to. I swear if looks could kill, Sirius would have dropped dead on the dance floor. I wouldn't be mad at him though. I really don't think they're trying to hurt you."

"What do you mean?"

"James, you're either really stupid or trying to play dumb. This is why you came with me right? To talk about Lily?" She asked.

He waited to answer while she ordered their drinks, "Well…sotra."

"Sorta? I will take that as a yes. Listen I told Lily that I wouldn't tell anyone but you look really conflicted. Sirius and Lily are secretly dating but you can't say anything because no one is supposed to know."

James' heart dropped. Lily and Sirius? Together? They wouldn't…couldn't do that to him. He searched for them in the crowed and found them laughing together. His stomach jumped. He knew that he was a jerk and that he wasn't the best friend he should have been but he honestly didn't think Sirius would sink that low and go out with Lily. He knew their history, he was right there next to James while it happened.

"You okay?" Alice asked grabbing two of the drinks.

James nodded and grabbed the remaining two. He followed her over to the table, put down the drinks and left the table. Jessica, Frank and Alice watched him walk off in confusion. He didn't hear Frank ask Alice, "Did something happen?"

All he could hear was ringing. He was so angry and he didn't even understand why. Sirius and Lily were unattached and had no obligation to him. Lily and him weren't friends and he could certainly understand why Sirius wouldn't want anything to do with him. He scanned the crowd looking for them…where were they?

Lily and Sirius sat at a table off in the corner hiding from all the other aurors. Lily couldn't believe how many people actually wanted to talk to Sirius. Sirius told her that half the people wouldn't even have come over if it weren't for her. She rolled her eyes at that comment.

"Ugh, my feet hurt so bad," Lily complained.

"Yeah, it's a good thing a decided to go with this suit instead of the dress and high heels," Sirius said grinning.

Lily laughed, "But I thought you looked so sexy in the dress!"

"Yeah maybe I'll wear it on my next date!"

"Yeah sure," She said, "Hey I got a question. Why have you been so good?"

"Huh?"

"Well Nicole said you make these things fun. Not that you haven't but she made it seem like you did something."

Sirius nodded, "Yeah. Remember that one ball James took you to when we were sixteen?"

"Yeah, he said his parents always made him come," She said nodding.

"And remember when we turned all the women's hair green?" Sirius said grinning.

Lily nodded grinning. She remembered. She scolded James and Sirius for an hour when they got back home, "Oh yeah. Mrs. Potter was so angry."

Sirius nodded, "Our first ball as aurors here we did it again. That was the ball Nicole went to with Nathan."

"You're horrible."

Sirius grinned, "Yeah but I'm on my best behavior tonight."

"Yeah? Why's that?" She asked laughing.

"Because I'm out with a lady tonight," He said.

Lily laughed, "Puh-lease, Black, you can't fool me. What are you planning?"

"Puh-lease? Have we traveled back to our fifth year?"

"Come on, you can tell me. I promise I won't blow it."

"I'm insulted. Why won't you believe me that I don't have anything planned?" He asked.

"Because you're grinning like a mad man!" Lily said, "Tell me!"

Sirius shook his head, "Nope. You'll just have to wait like everyone else!"

"I don't wanna!" She complained.

Jessica was seething in her seat. James had just walked off with no explanation and Alice was swearing that nothing had happened when they went off to get drinks. Jessica did not buy it. James had been acting weird all night. She was not stupid. When she was trying to get his attention before he was staring at that red head, the one she had met at the zoo. Then while she was trying to talk to him about his boss, he was off staring at her again! She could have sworn he was staring at the woman while they were dancing to but she wasn't sure.

How dare he just walk off and ignore her calls? Who did he think he was? She got up and walked away from the table without saying goodbye. James must learn that she wasn't going to be ignored like that. That's not how it worked. She was in the middle of the dance floor and people were bumping into her. She glared at them even though she was in their way. She demanded respect. She couldn't' find James anywhere but she saw the little red head and the trash she was with.

She didn't feel sorry for what she did to Sirius. He had to go the moment she heard him talking crap about her to James. She wasn't stupid. Guys listened to their best friends. It would have been only a matter of time before James came to his senses and got rid of her. So she did what any girl would have done in her place, she got rid of him first. It wasn't that hard either. She never liked him anyway. He was always playing around, making stupid jokes and he was just plain annoying.

When she couldn't find James anywhere, she decided that she would stay close to the red head. She had a feeling that he'd show up there eventually. If not lucky him. She stared at the red head. She wasn't going to deny that she was pretty, beautiful in fact. It really made her sick that she got along with James' friends. If James started to talk to Sirius again. It would only take a matter of time before he realized that this girl fit better in his life than she did. She wouldn't let this happen. James was hers and she would let this little witch know it.

James was stopped by his boss and his wife. He didn't even try to pay attention to what they were saying. They were way past drunk and not making any sense. Anytime he tried to leave, they would grab his arm and say something else. It was getting ridiculous. All he wanted was to find Sirius and let him know how he really felt about him. He knew he shouldn't be this angry. He had a girlfriend who was probably pretty pissed now but he did not want to think about that.

"Oh there's Jessica. I think I better go. She said something about having a headache. I better get her home," James said excusing himself.

"Oh okay, safe home you," The boss' wife said.

James shook his head, walking off. He really did not see Jessica but he needed to get away from them. He turned around and spotted Sirius and Lily sitting at a little table in the corning. It made his blood boil. He stomped over. It seemed to take forever to pass the annoying people who wanted to talk but he just blew them off. He finally got over to the table and stood over them making Lily jump.

"James!"

Ha ha ha…I'm so mean! I guess you'll just have to wait to see what a happens. I swear I'll try to update quicker than this! Thanks to everyone for who reviewed. Oh and you'll find out what really happened between James and Lily soon, promise!


	5. Chapter 5

"James!"

Lily stared up at James different emotions ran through her. She wasn't expecting him to come up to them. When she was talking to Alice, she just figured that if they stayed out of his way there wouldn't have to be any awkward moments. Nowhere in her plan was there a face-to-face chat. But this wasn't going to be a friendly chat and she could tell this because James looked pissed.

"Sirius, I need to talk to you," James said. He looked at Lily, "Alone."

Lily stood her shoulders straight up, "Well then you'll just have to wait. We were in the middle of a conversation."

James looked at Sirius who just shrugged his shoulders, "You heard her."

"Please, Lily, I really need to talk to Sirius. It's important."

"Anything you have to say you can say in front of her. I mean if it's that important," Sirius said. His eyes were blank and weren't giving away the annoyance he felt.

"I'm not playing," James said angry.

Sirius leaned over to Lily and whispered in her ear, "Just go. It'll only be a second."

Lily narrowed her eyes, "Fine," She snapped.

She got up and walked over to the wall where Nicole's ex boyfriend, Nathan was standing.

"Hey, Nathan," Lily said.

He smiled, "Lily! How are you?"

"Pretty good," She replied, "How about you?"

The rest of the conversation Lily was trying to pay attention to but she was too busy staring at Sirius and James. They both looked pretty pissed by now and she could tell the words they were exchanging were not pleasant. Why did James have to decide to talk to Sirius now? Was it really necessary?

Nathan smiled and looked over to Sirius and James, "So it's true then?"

Lily looked up, "Huh?"

"That you and Sirius are together?"

"What?" Lily asked confused, "Where the hell did you hear that?"

Why the hell was everyone thinking that she and Sirius were together? He was like her brother. Bloody hell, people had some serious issues here.

"OH MY GOD!" Lily yelled as she watched James punch Sirius in the face.

Nathan and Lily ran over as James walked off in a huff. Lily knelt down to the floor where Sirius was, "Are you okay?"

Sirius stood, "Yeah. Shit, that hurt."

"Sit down," Nathan said.

They all walked over to the table and Sirius cursed again, "What the bloody hell!"

Lily took a look at his eye. She pressed down lightly around the skin and Sirius flinched, "Watch it."

"Sorry," She said, "It'll be fine. You just need to put some ice on it. I can reduce the swelling. I'll need my wand though."

"Here I'll do it," Nathan said.

Lily looked around. People were talking and pointing over to where they were but she didn't see James. She was completely pissed off. What would cause James to just hit his best friend like that? Even if they weren't friends now she couldn't just see James flipping and hitting Sirius. It had to be something big.

"Sirius, what were you and James talking about?" She asked.

"Nothing," He replied but he didn't quite meet her eye.

"Oh and I'm supposed to just believe that he hit you in the face because you guys were talking about…nothing?" Lily asked crossing her arms.

"Uh, yeah," He said, "Lily listen, it was no big deal. Just drop it."

She narrowed her eyes, "I'll be back."

She got up and walked away. Sirius called after her but she kept on walking. She was going to get to the bottom of this. Lily looked around trying to find the annoying messy haired man but she didn't see him anywhere.

_He probably left._

She turned around and found another annoying person in her way. Expect she didn't have messy hair. In fact, it annoyed Lily that not even one hair was out of place on the blonde-haired woman's head. Lily resisted the urge to pull on the other woman's hair just to see if it was actually real.

Jessica had her mouth in a frown and her eyes narrowed, "Stay away from James."

Lily laughed, "Please there is nothing in the world that I would want more than to have James out of my life but it's getting to be very difficult!"

"If you want him out of your life so bad why are you trying to find him?" Jessica said.

"Oh I don't know, maybe because he punched my date right in the face," Lily said slowly as if she was talking to a five year old.

"Listen, Li-ly I've got more experience than you do in your finger. I will crush you, stay-away-from-James," She said and walked away, "He's mine."

"I DON'T WANT HIM!" Lily yelled after her causing a few people to give her dirty looks.

_Whatever, what the hell is wrong with everybody? Did I ever say that I wanted James back? No. Did I ever say that I was with Sirius…no!_

Twenty minutes later Lily had no clue where she was. She had climbed up stairs and walked through many windy hallways and was completely turned around. She groaned and cursed. Why the hell did she have to go find him, now she was lost. She turned around, hoping to go back to where she started. She came to three intersecting hallways and stomped her foot. She had no idea what way she came from. She looked to her left and noticed that there was a light coming from under a door at the end of the hallway. She knew that she didn't come from that way but something made her want to walk down to the door.

The hallway was a dull shad of maroon and had doors every couple of feet and Lily was curious as to what was in them but kept walking to the last door. She put her hand on the gold knob and slowly opened it. She peeked inside and saw nobody was there. Closing the door softly behind her she looked around. The room was some kind of library and it was the most beautiful room she had ever seen. The walls were a gold color and bookshelves were filled with books. She looked up at the ceiling and found that it was saw high she knew it had to be done by magic, it was coned up. She found there was a breathtaking picture of a painted angel on the ceiling.

She walked to the center of the room and noticed a fireplace, a lit fireplace. Someone had recently been in there. Over to the left Lily noticed a balcony and slowly walked over to it. If anyone was out there, she didn't want to disturb him or her. Looking out she saw that it was empty and stepped out onto it. Looking up she gasped. The stars were amazingly bright tonight. Since she left Hogwarts, she wasn't able to see the stars anymore.

"Lily?" A man's voice said.

She turned around and saw James standing there. His coat was gone and his white shirt was unbuttoned at the top where his tie hung loose. Lily felt her heartbeat quicken.

_Stop! She told her heart…that's not supposed to happen anymore!_

"Yeah?" She said quietly. She was quite aware that they were alone up there and she suddenly found holes in her little plan. Why didn't she think about this more?

"What are you doing up here?" He asked.

The question reminded her that she was supposed to be angry with him. She felt heat rise up to her face, "Me! I'm up here because of you…you jerk!"

James looked shock from her sudden change, "I um…what?"

Lily walked over to him and slapped him on the check, "WHY DID YOU HIT SIRIUS, YOU ASS! How could you do that to your best friend?"

James angry in ten seconds flat, "ME? I didn't do anything! He's the one that betrayed me!"

Lily laughed, "Betrayed you? Potter, you are something else!"

She pushed him out of the way and started to walk across the room. Almost to the door she turned around, "Excuse me but I believe you're the one who betrayed Sirius. He was a great best friend until YOU decided that having an airhead girlfriend was better than a best friend who's been there for you no matter what!"

"Don't talk about Jessica that way!"

"Oh but it's okay for her to talk about Sirius that way. At Hogwarts, I used to think that the only good thing about you was that you stuck by your friends no matter what. I was wrong there's nothing good about you," Lily snapped.

"Oh don't go talking to me like that, Lily! Sirius deserved what he got! And you know what? I don't know why I'm defending myself! You and Sirius both did this!" James said enraged.

"Me? What did Sirius and I ever do to you?" Lily asked affronted.

James gave a bitter laugh, "Like you don't know! Coming here together, knowing that I would be here. Flaunting your relationship, making me look like an idiot!"

Lily was shocked, "What the hell are you talking about! What relationship?"

"YOUR'S AND SIRIUS'!" James roared.

Angry boiled up inside Lily. She was getting sick and tired of having to go through this with everyone, "FOR THE LAST TIME, SIRIUS AND I ARE NOT TOGETHER! We are just good friends! He didn't want to take any of the girls he was dating because he didn't want them to think it was anything to serious so he asked if I would come with him as a friend because that's what friends do for each other."

James just stared at her, his face unreadable. Lily stomped her foot and walked to the door and jerked it open. Looking back she said, "You know James, I thought that you were a better person that this. I thought you would have at least respected for Sirius and I to know that we would never do something like that. Even if you were the one who ended our relationship I would never ever do something like that to you."

"Wait, you're the one who said no," James said.

"You gave me no choice," Lily replied quietly and shut the door.

Sirius looked around the dance floor and couldn't see Lily. She had been gone about forty minutes and he hadn't seen a wink of her. He was getting worried about what she would do. He was taking the lack of screams as a good sign but that didn't mean she still couldn't do damage.

As much as Sirius was pissed at James he also understood…somewhat. He could understand that James only punched him because he thought he was going out with Lily. Okay so that was about all he understood. What he couldn't understand why James would think that he or Lily would do that to him? He also couldn't understand why if James was so in love with Jessica why he would go searching for him to punch him. It was no surprise to Sirius that he didn't get what was going on with James. He didn't understand half the crap James had been doing when they were still friends.

He told him for months to stop being a prat and go after Lily. How hard is it to admit that you were wrong? Sirius knew Lily still loved him and she would have taken him back. Sure, it would have taken a little more than an apology to get him back in her good graces but she would have come around. But instead he sat at home and mopped but pretending he wasn't mopping. Sirius didn't get it. During Hogwarts James had done everything he could to get Lily's attention. He had always made mistakes when it came to Lily but James would be right back begging for Lily's forgiveness and she always forgave him, eventually. But when he made that big mistake and broke up with Lily, Sirius expected him to do what he had always done and get her back. He didn't do it though; instead, he acted as if it was finally over. Remus and Sirius didn't buy it though; Lily and James were meant to be. If they couldn't make it, nobody could.

"You don't think she cornered him and killed him, do you?" Nathan asked beside him.

Sirius sighed, "I don't know. Lily can get pretty crazy but she's also very level headed."

Nathan chuckled, "Yeah she can."

Just then, a figure with red hair came rushing over to them, "Hey guys. Where have you been? I was over by that table but I couldn't find you anywhere!" She said.

"Us? Where have you been? It's been ages!" Sirius said.

"I've been around," Lily said.

"How vague of you," Sirius replied.

"You look pretty calm for someone who just got done killing their ex," Nathan teased but by the look she gave him they could tell it was too soon to tease.

"Anyway I was thinking that if you just wanted to go we could," Sirius said to Lily.

"Oh no! Sirius you shouldn't let him ruin your night," Lily said.

Sirius shrugged, "It's no big deal. Besides I think it's already ruined," He pointed to his black eye.

Lily shook her head, "I still can't believe he did that."

"So, did you find him?" Nathan asked curious.

"Oh…no," Lily said.

"I figured, there weren't any loud screams or explosions," Sirius said, "It makes me sorta miss Hogwarts."

"Hardy har har," Lily said.

"Your maturity level astonishes me Lily," Sirius teased.

Lily stuck out her tongue, "You're just jealous!"

Sirius nodded his head, "Yes that must be it!"

"I wasn't that bad," Lily said.

Sirius gave her a look, "Actually you were pretty bad but James did sorta deserve it 90 percent of the time."

"Is that supposed to make me feel guilty for the ten percent that he didn't deserve?" Lily asked.

Sirius shrugged.

Lily narrowed her eyes, "Don't you play mind games with me, Black."

Nathan laughed, "Well I better go find my girlfriend. She's probably been suffering with the old hags."

"Bye Nathan," Lily said hugging him.

"Bye Lily…Sirius," Nathan said and walked away.

Once he was gone, Sirius turned on her, "So you want to go?"

"Only if you do."

"I'm not going to make you stay if you want to go," He said.

"I know."

Sirius laughed, "Thanks so much for the help."

Lily laughed, "Come on one more dance and then we'll go," She said leading him to the dance floor.

Lily laid in her bed that night unable to sleep. So much had happened that night and she couldn't sort it out, her mind was reeling. She wanted to talk to Nicole and Sam about it but she knew that Nicole would be at her new apartment with her boyfriend and Sam seemed to hate her. Besides, if she talked to them then it would reveal that she lied to them about James. As much as she was angry with him, she couldn't reveal what really happened a year ago. She'd be a fool. She didn't want to see pity in her friend's eyes and she told them.

She felt horrible enough when she lied to Sirius about not finding James. She didn't even know why she did. It was a stupid, pointless lie but it was also easier than facing those awkward questions. She sighed. She felt like she was being tangled up in a web of lies. She was supposed to be through this already. She had moved on with her life and was happy where she was.

Why did life have to be so complicating?

Hi! I know that it's been forever but I've been helping my friend with her baby. Her boyfriend and her are no longer together and she's having a rough time. Guy's are such cheating jerks…okay kidding not all. Anyway, so that's why it's taken me forever to post. I've had this done for a while but I haven't had the time to upload it. But thank you for being patient!

Oh and thanks to all my reviewers! You people are awesome and you always make my day!


	6. Chapter 6

DISCLAMIER: I DON'T OWN HARRY POTTER

"Can we please not do this now?" James asked Jessica.

She stood there livid, "No we can not do this later!"

"Fine!" He snapped sitting down, "What do want?"

Jessica looked astonished, James never snapped or yelled at her. It was a bad sign, "You know what I want! You completely embarrassed me! I stood there with everyone else watching you make a fool of me and our relationship!"

James felt like a complete jerk. He wasn't trying to make Jess feel bad but he had a lot of things going on at the moment. How could he explain his actions at the ball? It was like someone had taken control of his body and made him do those things. He wasn't thinking but the truth was that he could never think when it had to do with Lily. It had always been that way.

"I just want to know why."

"Huh?"

Jessica threw her high heel at the floor, "WHY! Why would you make a fool of me? Did you think of me at all?"

"Jess, I just can't talk about this right now. I never wanted to make a fool of you or hurt you," James said honestly, "It wasn't about that."

It was weird that the reason he went after Sirius was because he felt like a fool but going after him made Jess look like a fool. He shook his head, it was all too fresh in his mind. He just wanted to go home and sleep it off.

"Then what the hell was it about?" Jessica asked sitting down on a chair.

"Damn it, I don't know."

"Do you even care?" She asked.

"Of course I do. I'm just tired and I want to go home and sleep."

"That's another thing! You never let me sleep over at your house! I'm tired of this! I feel like you're always hiding something from me," She said surprising her herself. She never realized that it bothered her before but it did.

James looked up shocked. There was no way he could tell her why he couldn't let her in his bed. She would only get more angry and he honestly didn't want to deal with that right now, was it jerky of him to think that?

"Listen, Jess can we please talk about this later? I really need to sleep."

She looked at him sadly, "Why can't you just sleep here?"

He wanted to groan, did she ever let up? He was tired and he wanted to go home. He wanted to be alone so he could think this whole thing through, "Jess, please."

"Fine!" She snapped, "Go home!"

She stomped down the hall to her room and slammed the door. He sighed, tomorrow he was going to owe a lot of people apologizes and he wasn't looking forward to any of them.

James sat in his living room the next day. Jessica was sitting next to him, she had tears in her eyes and wasn't saying anything. James knew she was hurting but he didn't know what to say to make it better, to make her stop crying.

"I just…I don't James. It doesn't seem to be working, does it?" She asked.

"We can make it work. I just need you to forgive me," He said, "I wasn't thinking, it was a mistake."

Jessica was shaking her head, "I thought we were going somewhere. You just don't seem to be as serious about me as I am about you."

Fear was boiling in James stomach, "No I am! I swear."

"You don't seem to have made any commitment towards me," She said.

He couldn't believe this was happening, "I have, just let me fix this!"

"How can you?"

"I want to show you how much I love you," He said.

"We've been dating eight months James. I don't see this relationship going anywhere."

"No! Just give me a chance to prove that it is!" He said desperately.

"How?"

James froze up, he knew the answer but he hated himself for thinking it. He got up, Jessica stared at him confused as he walked to his office. He went to his and opened the bottom drawer. He grabbed the tiny back box and ran out of his office. He knew it was wrong in so many ways but he didn't have a choice. If she left him he would no one.

Minutes later he was in shock. He didn't understand why he was down on one knee and why Jessica was smiling and tears of joy were coming down her face. She had slipped on the engagement ring as she staring happily at it. But it all felt wrong. This wasn't supposed to happen. He had to see Lily.

"Lily you have got to be kidding me!" Julia said shocked.

Lily shook her head as her and Julia walked into St. Mungo's, "I'm not kidding. He punched Sirius right in the eye."

Julia started to laugh, "Oh my god, I wish I saw that!"

Lily stopped in front of the lift and turned around, "Ju! It was not funny! He could have hurt him badly. He's so immature. I thought he grew out of getting into fights when he didn't get what he wanted."

They walked into the lift which was empty, "Obviously not," Julia said, "What I can't believe is that Sirius didn't do anything. Did he really just stand there?"

"Well of course he did!" Lily said, "What did you expect him to do, James is his best friend."

Julia followed Lily to her office, her shift started in ten minutes, "I don't know about that. I thought they didn't even talk?"

"Just because James wants to forget about all the things that they did for each other doesn't mean Sirius doesn't."

Lily sat behind her desk and rubbed her face, "I'm tired of thinking about this. James is an idiot, that's it."

"Okay, fine," Julia, "…so…how bad is his eye?"

"Julia!"

Julia burst out laughing, "I'm sorry but come on Lily! It's hilarious!"

"How is this hilarious? Sirius got hurt," Lily said frowning.

"James punched him in the eye! He didn't throw a curse at him, Lily," Julia said rolling her eyes.

Lily frowned at her friend, "Don't you have work to do?"

Julia laughed, "Okay, I get the hint. I'm leaving. I'll see you at lunch!"

Lily was glad to see her go. She was tired of her friends rubbing off what James did like it was no big deal. He attacked Sirius over something childish, what the hell was wrong with everybody?

Lily spent the next two hours running from patient to patient, it seemed like everyone thought it was a great idea to brew their own potion today. What was even worse was Bolter thought it was a great idea to go behind her and tell her patients the opposite of what she was telling them. Sometimes she wondered if it was like a floor joke, let's see how long it takes Lily to crack. If that was the case she'd take a bluger to her own head if it would get the rest of the healers off her back.

"Is there something wrong, Evans?" Bolter asked her.

"Not at all, sir," Lily said very much wanting to kick him in the balls.

"If you can't keep up maybe you'd be better suited as a receptionist," Bolter said.

"I can handle it," Lily said forcing herself to keep looking him in the eye.

"I hope so," He said and walked off.

Yeah right..

She had the sudden urge to throw her clipboard at the back of his head. Was that his way of dealing with the women on this floor? Make them receptionist or fire them? If they don't quit first.

Everyday at work Lily felt more and more closer to losing her job. She was thinking that she might as well just quit and keep her dignity. She couldn't let the other guys on the floor see Bolter firing her. She could just see them all planning a party after she left. Well some of them actually did hate Bolter but for the sake of their jobs they stayed clear of Lily. She didn't blame them, they had families.

She looked at her watch and realized that Julia would probably be waiting in her office for lunch already. She walked to her office hoping Julia wasn't going to bring up the ball because she really didn't want to talk about it after the day she had. She walked into her office and was about to apologize for being late when she realized that the person sitting the chair wasn't Julia but James. She would recognize the back of his messy head anywhere. She almost groaned but stopped herself. If she was a second quicker she could have snuck right back out the door but he was already turning around.

"I almost thought that Julia warned you I was in here and you weren't going to come," James said.

Lily walked over to her desk and sat down, "No she didn't."

In her head she promised to kill Julia.

Lily waited for him to say something because obviously he had something to say or he wouldn't have came all the way there. He said nothing.

"What do you want, James?"

"I just wanted to talk," He said.

"Obviously," Lily replied.

"You're not going to make this easy are you?" James asked.

"I don't see why I should."

James stared at her like he was trying to decide if he should say what was on his mind or not, "Can we go out, sometime?"

Lily nearly coked on her own spit, "What?"

"Like for a drink or something…" James said.

Something's never change.

"James you have a girlfriend," Lily said angry.

"No I meant like as friends. To catch up."

"I don't think that's a good idea," Lily said. She had enough of Jessica at the ball she didn't need the blonde coming after her while she slept and this time Lily wouldn't blame her.

"Please Lily. I just wanted to apologize for what I did at the ball," James said.

"Did you apologize to Sirius?"

James paused for a second, "Well…no…"

"Then as for as I'm concerned this conversation is over," She said getting up.

"No, wait. I mean I am going to apologize. I was going to go over there as soon as I was done talking to you."

Lily sat down again, "James, this isn't school anymore. We're in the real world."

"I get that!"

"God, James what the hell is the matter with you?"

"What?"

Lily shook her head, "You should have gone straight to Sirius and not me. You and Sirius have been friends longer than me or Jessica. You've done some pretty stupid things James and Sirius has been right by your side. He never left you and then all the sudden you drop him because your girlfriend doesn't like him. You've turned right back into that boy that I hated in school. No I take that back because the boy at school wouldn't have dropped Sirius for even me. Not that I would have ever asked you to. James, what happened to you?"

James looked at his legs and looked up again, "Lily, this wasn't supposed to happen. I didn't see it going like this."

"What do you want from me?" Lily asked.

"I want you to forgive me."

From the way James was looking at her she knew that this had nothing to do with the ball and everything to do with them but she wasn't ready to forgive him. No, she wanted to hate him for what he did to her. And how dare he come to her work and ask her that. What the hell was his problem anyway?

He must of read her mind because he said, "I know that I've made a lot of mistakes and I'm ready to take responsibility for them."

"I can't forgive you James, you haven't even gone to Sirius yet. You should have gone to him first."

"Okay what if I go to Sirius and then I come back?" James asked.

Lily almost laughed, it was like they were in school again. Egger to do anything to please her but they weren't at school anymore and he was with Jessica. She didn't know why that thought depressed her so much.

"We'll see."

Sirius was a little more than shocked to see James standing there when he opened his apartment door. It wasn't exactly a welcome visit. He wasn't exactly sorry for the cold stare he was giving James at the moment. His black eye still hurt like hell and he wasn't ready to laugh it off.

"Hey," James said.

"What?" Sirius asked coldly.

"Um, can we talk?" James asked nervously.

Sirius felt a great power hearing James voice lower. As much as he would always see James as his best friend, he was angry and betrayed. They made a pact to never let anyone get between them and James had broken that.

Sirius leaned against the door frame, "Have something on your mind, James?"

"Uh, yeah," He said.

Sirius thought for a second, not really sure if he wanted to let James in, "Fine. Come in."

James followed Sirius through his messy place and sat on the couch, "Listen, I never wanted to hurt you. That was the last thing I was trying to do. I just wanted to talk to you and the next thing I knew-"

"-You hit me," Sirius finished.

"Uh, yeah. Sirius I'm sorry man."

Sirius stared at him "You're an ass."

James nodded slowly, "Yeah, pretty much."

"No I mean you really are an ass. I mean completely and totally an ass. I could totally kill you right now…"

James just sat there unsure of what to say but, "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have choose Jessica over you. I didn't want to. I don't know what happened."

"Okay, so…did you break up with her?" Sirius asked.

"What? No!" James said.

Sirius held up his hands, "Sorry…It's just that you're acting like you did."

James groaned and put his head in his hands, "I think I've made a mistake."

"That's for sure but seriously how many more can you possibly make?" Sirius asked.

James shook his head, "No this is big, bigger than anything I've done."

Sirius laughed because there was no way that James could top breaking up with Lily, "What are you talking about?"

"I think I proposed to Jessica."

"WHAT!" Sirius yelled, "What do you mean you think? You did or you didn't."

"I don't know! I mean I know I did but I don't know how it happened. One minute she was sitting there crying threatening to break up with me and the next I was on my knees proposing. I was scared she'd leave! Sirius she's basically all I have left. Without her I have no one. I mean Lily and you hate me and I'm pretty sure Remus does to because he hasn't been answering my owls."

"I don't hate you and I'm sure Remus doesn't either," Sirius said.

"Really? So that means you forgive me?" James asked.

Sirius paused for a second then said, "Of course. You're my brother and you always will be. No matter how much you're an ass."

James laughed and said, "You didn't say anything about Lily."

"Huh?"

"You said that you and Remus didn't hate me."

"Yeah well I'm pretty sure Lily hates you, no offence but she was ready to curse you into oblivion at the ball. You really are lucky she didn't find you," Sirius said.

James frowned, "What are you talking about? She did find me or rather I found her."

Sirius looked at James confused, "What?"

"Yeah, she nearly killed me."

"Why would she lie to me then?" Sirius asked.

James shrugged, "Yeah that's kinda weird, you know how Lily likes people to know how she's feeling."

Sirius shook his head, "…I cannot believe you proposed to Jessica…What the hell is wrong with you?"

James groaned and leaned back on Sirius couch.

**And that's chapter six! I hope you liked it. James and Jessica engaged and Lily lied to Sirius. Oh and I don't know if you caught it but Lily is going to have bigger job problems soon. **

**Okay so I know some people are going to have a problem with Sirius just forgiving James just like that so I'm going to explain now before there's a riot about it. Well it's not really hard to explain. James and Sirius have been friends for like ever now and even though James did some pretty messed up things Sirius is always going to forgive him. Like if your sister or brother did something horrible to you you'd forgive them because they're family and that's how James and Sirius are. Okay so I hope you don't hate this chapter because I kinda like it. I'm finally getting to where I want the story to be. More things are coming out in the open. I'm not sure if Lily's going to find out about the engagement in the next chapter or not. What do you guys think? You want her to find out now or in a couple chapters? Let me know! **

**OH AND THANK YOU SO MUCH TO THOSE WHO REVIEWED MY LAST CHAPTER. I'VE HAD THE WORST TWO WEEKS AND YOU ALL MAKE IT ALL BETTER BY REVIEWING! THANKS!**


	7. Chapter 7

"I'm a little lost," Nicole said to Sirius two days later at a crowded bar.

"Yeah me to," Julia said.

Sirius sighed, "Why can't you girls just pay attention."

"Because it doesn't make sense, that's why," Julia said.

"Yeah I mean what the hell is the whole point?" Nicole asked.

Sirius shook his head and muttered, "Women."

Lily laughed, "It's not their fault Sirius. They never went to any Quidditch games in school."

For the past hour Sirius was trying to explain Quidditch to Nicole and Julia and was failing miserably. Lily knew that part of the reason they didn't understand was because they didn't care to but Sirius wouldn't hear anything of it. He was completely determined to make them love Quidditch as much as him.

"Sorry we didn't date a Quidditch star in school, Lily," Nicole said.

Lily all the sudden felt really hurt and she couldn't explain why. She ignored the feeling, "It's not a complicating game. You just have to pay attention. You get into it after a while."

"It sounds completely boring," Julia said, "No wonder I never went to anyone of the games."

"Yeah well I was too busy sleeping," Nicole said, "Who the hell wakes up that early for a game?"

"You girls are completely hopeless," Sirius said while Lily laughed.

Lily looked down at her watch, "I guess Sam isn't going to show."

Nicole gave her a small smile, "She hasn't answered my owls nor calls."

They looked at Julia who said, "Don't look at me. She hasn't called me either and I wasn't even there."

The three girls looked at Sirius.

"What? You really think that if she hasn't called or written you girls that she's going to talk to me? Yeah right."

"I knew this was going to happen," Nicole said.

"Huh?" Lily asked.

"Her dating Sirius," Nicole said looking at Sirius, "Did you really have to go out with her?"

"Hey, this isn't Sirius fault," Lily said.

"Okay, sorry," Nicole said, "I'm just mad that she's acting like she's sixteen again."

"We weren't even really going out," Sirius said.

Nicole threw her hands in the air, "See! That's exactly what I'm talking about! Sirius, you know that Sam gets a little too emotional about things."

"Oh sorry, I was under the impression that role was taken by you," Sirius replied.

"Yeah well-"

"SHUT UP!" Lily yelled, "What the hell is the matter with you two?"

"She started it," Sirius muttered.

Lily rolled her eyes, "Why is it that every time that you two get within ten feet of each other that you guys have to start a fight?"

Sirius and Nicole looked at each other and than looked away.

"Hey look, it's Adam," Julia said pointing in the middle of the crowd.

Adam walked over and gave Nicole a kiss hello, "Hey, guys sorry I'm late."

"Work?"

Adam nodded, "So what's going on?"

"Sirius is trying to explain Quidditch to Nicole and Julia," Lily said.

Adam laughed, "Good luck. Nicole hates going to the games with me. Scratch that, she won't go to the games with me."

"I just don't get it," Nicole said.

Minutes later Julia and Nicole were explaining to Adam why Quidditch was a waste of time. Sirius grinned and caught Lily's eye who smiled back. For about five minutes life seemed to go back to normal. The only thing missing was Sam and Lily wasn't sure how she was going to fix her friendship with Sam when she wasn't even sure what she did wrong. Sam had always known that she was close with Sirius so why would she all the sudden get so possessive of him? If only Sam would actually talk to Lily she could figure out how she could make it up to her.

"He's what?" Remus asked for the third time.

"He's engaged, Remus. Like he got down on one knee and asked Jessica to marry him. The whole white dress and flowers and shit," Sirius replied.

Remus shook his head, "What the hell is wrong with him?"

Sirius shrugged, "I don't know."

"Does Lily know?"

Sirius looked at him, "What do you think?"

Remus shrugged, "I don't know."

"Yeah, I don't either but I doubt that she does. She hasn't said anything," Sirius said.

"Sirius, you can't expect her to tell you everything."

Sirius frowned. He wasn't angry at Lily for not telling him that she found James, he was more hurt than anything. He wanted to ask her about it but every time they were together there was other people around. Lily wouldn't forgive him if he started some kind of scene in front of people.

"Remus she lied to me."

Remus looked thoughtful, "No offence Sirius but your not her best friend. I mean you are one of them but you aren't _the _best friend. I think she would have told Nicole over you. You can't replace James with Lily. It's not how it works."

Sirius rolled his eyes, it was such a Remus response. He wasn't trying to replace James with Lily, "Whatever."

Remus rolled his eyes back, "Sirius, you're acting like a child. If you're so upset about it why don't you go talk you Lily about it?"

"I will," He said.

Remus watched Sirius sit on his couch not moving, "Yeah, sure."

"I am! Just not now. She's still at work."

"Admit it, Your scared that she'll get mad at you," Remus said laughing.

"Am not!"

"Are!"

"Not!"

"Are!

"NOT!"

"Wow, you two really are like children," Lily said walking into Sirius apartment, "I could hear you two fighting from down the hall."

"He started it," Sirius said.

Remus rolled his eyes, "Whatever."

"That's really witty Remus, where do you come up with these things?" Sirius asked.

Lily laughed, "Do I need to hand out time outs?"

Remus looked pointedly at Sirius and then at Lily, "Well, I guess I should get going now, lots to do."

"With what?" Sirius asked.

Remus rolled his eyes for what felt like the thousandth time, Sirius was never the fast one, "Don't worry your pretty little head about it," Remus replied.

Sirius grinned and looked at Lily, "He thinks my head is pretty."

Lily rolled her eyes as Remus walked out the door, "You're an idiot."

"I try."

"God, I'm hungry. I think I'm going to make spaghetti, want some?" Lily asked.

"Do you even have to ask?" Sirius asked.

Lily laughed, "Good point."

They left Sirius apartment and made their way over to Lily's. Sirius crashed on Lily's couch while she went into the kitchen. He turned on her Television and flipped through the channels until he found something interesting. It looked like some show that was showing funny home videos.

Lily stood in the kitchen flicking her wand at the pots. Filling them with water and settled them on the stove. She put the flame down and then joined Sirius on the couch. They watched TV, laughing at the funny parts while Lily would randomly get up and check on dinner.

"It's done!" Lily yelled from the kitchen.

"Awesome!" Sirius said getting up.

He went into the kitchen and sat down at the table. Grabbing the noodles and sauce he knew it was now or never. He had to talk to her about James even though he would rather act like he never talked to James. It would only bug him till he said something.

Lily sat down, "Good?"

"Yeah."

Not liking the sound of his voice she said, "Are lying?"

"What? No!"

"Then why are you acting weird like that," She accused.

"It doesn't have anything to do with your cooking," He said.

"Oh, then what about? Work?" She asked getting her own noodles.

He watched her pour sauce over them, "No, I talked to James."

Lily's face met his, "Oh?"

"Uh, yeah. He came over to apologize."

"Well it's about time," Lily replied.

Sirius took another bit unsure of how to ask her, "Yeah."

"I guess you should know that he came to see me to," She said.

"What?" He asked socked, "When?"

Lily thought, "A couple days ago."

"What happened? He asked.

"He wanted to apologize to. He wanted to go out for a drink, you know, as friends. He wants to be friends with me, weird right? Well I asked him if he talked to you and he said that he was going to right after he talked to me. I told him that unless he talked to you I couldn't do anything for him. You're his best friend and he should have went straight to you. I guess he was probably scared but it's no excuse."

Sirius nodded, "Oh, well I guess he listened to you."

Lily nodded, "Well what do he say to you?"

"Oh nothing really. We just talked about things. You know about everything," Sirius said causally.

"So, are you guys friends again? I mean did you forgive him?" Lily asked.

"Yeah."

Lily nodded, "That's good. I'd hate it if you two never talked again. You guys were always close."

Sirius nodded. He figured he should probably just get it over with, "He said some interesting stuff."

Lily looked up from her plate, "Yeah? About what?"

"You."

Lily frowned, "What are you talking about?"

"That you two talked at the ball. You know after he punched me."

Lily looked down and said, "Oh."

Sirius nodded, "Yeah."

She looked back up, "Listen, Sirius, it wasn't like I wanted to lie to you."

"Then why did you?"

"Nathan was there. I didn't want to talk about it with him there! Then when we left the ball is was so much easier not to talk about it, to just forget that it ever happened. I was angry at him and I didn't to talk about it," She said.

"You could have just told me that. I wouldn't have pressed it," Sirius replied.

"I know," She said sadly, "It just not easy okay."

Sirius felt confused, "What do you mean?"

"I mean it's not easy. For a whole year I didn't see him and I was fine. I was getting along with my life and then all the sudden it's like he forced his way back into my life. He wants to be my friend Sirius! _My_ friend! How can I forget what he did to me?" She asked.

Sirius frowned, "I know it must hurt especially with Jessica around," He decided that he wasn't going to say anything about the engagement, it would only hurt her more, "but don't you think you should just give him a chance to be your friend?"

Lily looked at him sadly. He just didn't get it and why should he? She never talked about the end of her relationship with him. It was coming close to the time when she would have to open up about it but she wasn't ready, not yet. Besides if James didn't tell him why should she?

"I'll think about it," She said.

Nicole sat at her desk at work. She watched her co-workers walk in and out of the office. Some of them staring at parchments and others writing profusely. The department of Magical Accident and Catastrophes was always pretty busy but she couldn't concentrate. Needless to say she was extremely distracted. Sam had once again ignored a letter from her and she was getting pretty sick of it. Nicole hadn't even gone to the ball with Sirius so why the hell would she be mad at her? Well probably because Nicole snapped at her when she got angry. Sam was the one who was acting childish about the whole thing.

Nicole tried to forget about it while she stared at her report. She was supposed to be reporting what happened at the Wilson's house. They're nine year old daughter, Amanda, was bitten by the neighbors dog. While little Amanda cried she accidentally blew the dog up. If she was upset about being bitten it was nothing compared to how she felt after blowing up a dog. Her mother informed Nicole that dogs were Amanda's favorite animal. Nicole had to call in the obliviators for this one as their neighbor was a muggle. Nicole thought she felt as bad as the little girl.

Nicole grabbed a clean piece of parchment and wrote:

**Sam,**

**I can't actually believe that I'm writing you once again but here I am. It's clear to me that you don't want to talk to me or Lily or anyone else for that matter but I don't care, I want to talk to you. This has gone on far to long. I get that you're mad but you have no reason to be. You know that Lily would never go for Sirius. For one, he's not her type. Two, he's like a brother to her. Three, she's our best friend and she would never to anything to hurt you. But it's clear that you would rather let a guy get in between us than let it go and just apologize for acting like an idiot. **

**This is going to be my last letter to you. I can't keep forcing my friendship on you. If you don't want it that's fine…well okay it's not fine but if that's what you want I guess I'll just have to learn to except it. **

**I just have to say this: Sirius is NOT worth it. **

**Nicole**

**P.S I really hope you write back**

Nicole re-read the letter, happy with it she put it in her purse. She would send it when she got home. She really hoped Sam wrote back. She didn't want their friendship to end. Especially not like this.

James stood pacing by his desk in the department of magical law enforcement. He actually came to work today. Usually he would wait till they called open him but he couldn't stay at home. Jessica was there right now already planning the wedding he didn't want. He really wanted to curse himself for being so stupid.

It's not that he didn't love Jessica but he wasn't sure if he was in love with her. He stopped pacing, his heart pounding when reality set in. He couldn't actually believe that he just thought that and it wasn't just a thought it was true. He _wasn't _in love with Jessica. He was just so scared that she was going to walk out on him.

Panic set in. What the hell was he going to do? He had to fix this. He couldn't marry someone he wasn't in love with. It wasn't supposed to happen this way. God how he wished he was back at school. Anytime he made some kind of mistake his friends could always help him out of it but as Lily reminded him they weren't at school. They were in the real world and his actions did have consequences.

**Okay so there's chapter seven. I know there's probably some major grammar problems but I haven't had time to go over my chapters because I'm getting so behind in school and well my life. So please don't chew me out about it, unless you feel you have to.**

**Well I didn't want Lily didn't find out about James' engagement yet so sorry to those who were hoping on it. I was starting to write the scene when she did find out about it but then I didn't want to anymore. I kind of want James to sweat about it, ya know? It's so much fun torturing him. Anyway don't quote me on this but there might be something to do with Lily's work in the next chapter. I don't want to give anymore away. I realize that not much happened in this chapter, I hope you're not too disappointed over it. I was kind of setting stuff up for the next one. I can positively say that there will be some Sam action in the next chapter though. So please stick with me!**

**Oh and thanks to everyone who reviewed. You guys are awesome! **

**Okay well I want to address a problem with my fic that a reviewer had. It's about James purposing to Jessica. I know that it seems a little far fetched that he would purpose to her when he has some issues about her sleeping over at his house but he was scared he was going to lose her. He wasn't really in his right mind when he did it. I really did think that it would make things more interesting and I'm sorry for ruining it for those who don't think so. I really do hope that everyone keeps reading. **


	8. Chapter 8

Lily stood in front of the hair salon with Nicole in Diagon Ally. Nicole practically forced Lily to go with her. At the moment Nicole was dead set on trying to get Lily to get a hair cut but Lily loved her long hair and would not part with it for anyone. She knew this would happen the moment Nicole asked if she would come along. Nicole was always trying to get Lily to get her hair cut or get something done with it.

"Nicole, didn't you just get your hair cut? It doesn't even look like it needs to be cut?" Lily said eyeing Nicole's beautiful brown hair.

Nicole gave Lily a little look and then obviously decided that she should just be honest. Lily only found out the real reason Nicole wanted to go to Diagon Ally was because she was talking to Sam's mother who told her that Sam would be in Diagon Ally today. Lily didn't understand why Nicole wanted to spy on Sam. Why she got suckered into doing things like this Lily had no clue.

Lily really did want to talk to Sam but Sam obviously didn't want to talk to her. So why should she keep writing and keep asking to talk to her? If Sam was that angry with Lily over a guy Lily wasn't so sure she wanted that kind of friendship back. Lily silently sighed, life was so much easy at Hogwarts.

"Come on, Lils. Don't you want to yell at her?" Nicole asked.

Lily rolled her eyes, "If it was only that easy. She doesn't want to see us Nicole."

"So? Since when did we ever back off when one of us didn't want to talk? We sure wouldn't go away when James popped up back in your life, so why should we back off of Sam?" Nicole asked.

"I thought you wrote her a letter saying you weren't going to bother her anymore if she didn't write back," Lily said, "You didn't mean it did you?"

"At the time I did," Nicole said, "But then I thought, would I want you two to back off when I'm upset? No I'd want my best friends with me."

Lily gave her a look of disbelief, "This is more than just being upset, Nicole. It just doesn't make any sense."

Nicole nodded, "Yeah I know, I want to know what."

"You're really nosy," Lily commented.

"Yeah, I know. Now let's go shopping."

"I thought we were looking for Sam?" Lily asked confused.

Nicole sighed like she was working with an idiot, "Lily, we can't just go _looking_ for Sam. She'd know then. We have to act like we are shopping and just happened to run into her."

"Yeah but what if her mother warned her?" Lily asked trying to catch up with Nicole who just walked off into the crowed.

"She hasn't and won't," Nicole said shaking her head, "She wrote me because Sam has been ignoring her parents as well. She wanted to know if I had heard from her."

"That doesn't sound like Sam," Lily said worriedly.

"I know," Nicole said agreeing, "That's why we got to talk to her."

"Is there a reason why we are in Diagon Ally hiding from your fiancé?" Sirius asked James.

"We aren't hiding," James said.

"Uh, yeah we are."

James made a frustrated sound, "She's been bothering me! I swear what colors do you think the bridesmaid dresses should be? What kind of flower do you like more? We need to talk about a date, _Jamie_. I mean come on! I can't handle anymore of these questions."

"Uh, you did ask her to marry you, mate. I mean that's what happens. At least that's what I'm told cause I would never be stupid enough to do something like that."

James gave him a shut-the-hell-up-now look.

Sirius shrugged, "What?"

James shook his head, "Let's go to Quidditch supplies."

"Okay."

James and Sirius fought through the crowd of weekend shoppers. Hogwarts at students were meeting up with their friends talking how best to spend their summer. James felt a little sad looking at them. He remembered how him, Sirius, Remus, and Peter would spend their summer at his house planning their pranks for the next year. He was thinking about how mum would give them a reprimanding every time she walked in on them when he saw a flash of red. Maybe it was because he was thinking of Hogwarts because he wiped his neck in the direction of the flash just like he did back at school.

He saw her, she was with Nicole and they were laughing. He just stood there and watched her laugh. He missed her smile and her laugh.

Sirius must have realized that James wasn't behind him anymore because he stopped and turned around. He looked over to where James was and followed the gaze of his eyes. Once he saw Lily he's stomach turned. James couldn't do this, not now. He walked over to James.

"Let's go."

"Uh?" James asked looking back at Sirius.

"I know you want to go talk to her but it's a bad idea," Sirius said.

"Why?" He asked.

"Unless you want to be blown up I would just walk away," Sirius told him.

"I just want to be here friend," James said.

Sirius nodded, "I know but I don't think she's ready for that. She's got a lot going on at the moment and I don't think she needs you confusing things up anymore."

"What do you mean?" He asked.

Sirius paused, he wasn't sure it was a good idea to tell James. Even though James was his best friend he wasn't completely ready to trust him with anything. Besides if Lily found out she told James about her life she would kill him, "Uh, just stuff."

"O-kay," James said, "What kind of stuff?"

"It's her business. If she wanted you to know she'd tell you."

James was a little resentful. Sirius used to tell him everything, even if it was a secret. He would trust James not to go run his mouth. It was kind of like a slap in the face and reality sunk in. James had betrayed Sirius and even though Sirius forgave him he still had to prove himself to Sirius.

_Bloody hell…_was anything going to go his way?

Lily stood in front of the book store looking in with Nicole wishing she was anywhere but here, "Nicole, can we please just go? This is stupid."

"No, let's go in."

"Why?" Lily whined.

Nicole looked at her, "Lily, you can be such a child sometimes."

Lily stuck out her tongue, "I don't want to go in."

"She could be in there," Nicole said.

"I know!"

Nicole rolled her eyes, "Come on, Lily."

Nicole walked to the door, held it open and looked behind her. Lily was still in the front of the window with her arms crossed, "Lily!"

Lily huffed and snapped, "Fine!"

Lily followed Nicole into the store, "I still think this is stupid."

"Don't you want to find out why Sam is ignoring everyone?" Nicole asked walking down an aisle pretending to look at the books.

"Uh, I already know. She's mad about Sirius. What's the point in asking when we already know?" She asked.

"Are you purposely trying to make this difficult?"

"Maybe."

They rounded a corner and Nicole opened her mouth to make a remark when he mouth dropped all the way. Lily laughed, "Trying to catch some flies?"

Nicole didn't answer her face was in complete shock. A frowned and rounded the corner to see what Nicole was looking at. What she found completely shocked her. Sam was holding Severus Snape's hand and was in the middle of kissing him.

"Well I guess we know why she didn't want to talk to anyone," Nicole said.

"What do you mean?"

"If it was me I wouldn't want anyone to know either," Nicole said.

"Nicole! That's a horrible thing to say. She's obviously not hiding it," Lily said, "Let's go over."

Lily made to move but Nicole grabbed her and pushed her behind the aisle, "Are you kidding me? You can't go over there!"

"Why not?"

"Uh, because it's Snape!" Nicole said like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"Nicole _are_ you kidding _me_? Aren't we over the petty school fights? It's been years now," Lily said rolling her eyes.

"This isn't about school fights, Lily," Nicole said whispering, "Don't you know that he's a death eater."

Nicole said the last word so quite that Lily wasn't sure that she heard right, "What? No he isn't. That's the stupidest thing I ever heard."

"No it isn't and you know it. Why else did you stop being friends with him in our fifth year?" Nicole asked.

"It wasn't because of that and you know it. He was just a very confused boy. I couldn't handle the type of people he hung out with but he would never do anything like that,Lily said stubbornly, "Anyway how would you know he's a you-know-what."

"I talk to people," Nicole said not elaborating.

Lily gave her a look, "Who?"

"It doesn't matter. Lily if you go over there and we start a scene who knows what could happen."

Lily rolled her eyes, "Aren't you being a littler dramatic?"

"No," Nicole said, "Let's get out of here."

Lily sighed, "So you dragged me all over Diagon Ally for nothing?"

Nicole didn't answer her. She grabbed Lily's hand and they quietly left the shop and ran right into two figures.

Lily looked up and nearly groaned, it was Sirius and James. How was this happening. At this point she would have rather had a confrontation with Sam and Severus. Sirius started to say something but Nicole shook her head and started to drag them away from the shop. Sirius gave Lily and look of confusion and Lily just shrugged. Only when they were finally a "safe" distance away did Nicole let them go.

"What the hell is going on?" Sirius asked.

"I don't know, Nicole seems to think we're in danger," Lily said rolling her eyes.

"You can laugh but you can ask Sirius and James and they'll tell you," Nicole said.

"Ask us what?" James asked.

Lily felt a little uncomfortable, "Nicole seems to think that Severus Snape is a you-know-what."

Sirius raised his eyebrows and James looked confused, "A what?"

Lily sighed, looked around and whispered, "A death eater."

Sirius and James gave each other a look which annoyed the hell out of Lily and she didn't know why, "What?"

"Well he is," Sirius and James said at the same time.

"Well I didn't think that you two would agree with me. I mean you three hated each other in school," Lily argued.

"It's not that, Lily," Sirius said, "We strongly suspect that he is."

Lily narrowed her eyes, "What are talking about?"

"Nothing," Nicole said, "We just all agree that he is."

Lily felt like she was being left out of some kind of secret and she didn't like it, "Fine, don't tell me. I still think you three are being stupid."

"Why does this matter anyway?" James asked.

"Because Sam is dating him," Nicole said.

"WHAT?" Sirius asked shocked.

Lily nodded, "Yeah we saw them together just now."

"How did that happen?" James asked.

They all shrugged, "Ugh, who knows."

They stood there quite, unsure what to do. They didn't know what this meant or what was going to happen. Lily was regretting ever coming. She just refused to believe that Severus was a death eater and couldn't believe that if he was Sam would date him. Her friends were not like that.

"So…" Nicole said.

"So, this is stupid! I'm going home!" Lily said angry.

She walked off mad. She couldn't believe that they got her to believe something like this and if they did know for sure then why were they keeping it a secret. Couldn't they just tell her what they knew. It was like they were all part of this whole little club and she was not invited. It didn't make sense. They only started to talk to James again so how the hell would he know?

"Lily! Wait!" It only aggravated her more that the voice belonged to James. She didn't even look back but kept walking, "Lily!"

He caught up to her, "Can we talk?"

"No."

"Lily, please."

She stopped, "What?"

"I'm sorry," He said.

"You're starting to sound like a broken record," She said annoyed.

"I know and I'm s-"

"If you say sorry one more time I swear to god, James Potter you won't live to see tomorrow," She said.

"O-kay," He said, "So, can we talk?"

She sighed, "What do you want from me?"

"Just your friendship," James said.

Lily was getting more frustrated by the minute, "Why is it so important that we're friends?" She asked.

"Because it is," He said not really knowing himself.

"That's not good enough," She said, "You don't get it."

"Yeah I do!" He argued getting tired of her saying that he didn't, "Why are you so scared to be my friend?"

Lily narrowed her eyes at him, "I'm not scared. I just don't see why I should be your friend."

James rubbed his hands over his face, "Okay, why don't we talk later? Can I come over later tonight?"

Lily stared at him, she didn't want him over at her place. What the hell? She didn't even want to talk to him. She was about to tell him to go to hell when he did something that shocked her more he grabbed her hand. Her heart started to beat faster, she was sure he could feel it. He smiled and she grabbed her hand away, he face turning red. She turned around and ran away, angry with herself. She was supposed to be over this. How could she just let him do that to her?

_God, damn it James Potter!_

She left him there with that smile on his face. He knew right then that she wasn't over it just as much as he wasn't. He had a chance.

Sirius and Remus sat on Lily's couch and hour later watching her pace in the front room anger radiating from her body. Every couple minutes they dared to give each other looks. She was ranting about James and they were a little confused about what was going on. She wasn't even talking in complete sentences.

"I mean how dare he ask me that?"

They looked at each other again.

"What the hell gives him the right to touch me!"

Sirius cracked a little smile trying hard not to laugh. It was really funny that Lily was getting all worked up for nothing. It made him wonder if Lily was really over James as she had always made them think.

"Friends? Come on!"

"Uh, Lily?" Remus dared to interrupt.

"What?" She stopped pacing like she had forgotten they were there.

"What are you on about?" Sirius asked.

"And you! You and Nicole sharing some kind of secret with him. How the hell do you three know that he's a death eater? How can you even have proof? I mean I guess you and James could have some kind of proof since you two are aurors but it wouldn't make sense because Nicole apparently knows. Is it some kind of ministry thing?" She asked.

Remus looked confused, "Who's a death eater?"

"Snape," Sirius replied.

"Oh, yeah," Remus said nodding.

That only frustrated Lily more, "This is ridicules!"

"Come on Lily, don't be like that!" Sirius said, "You know that he was into the dark arts in school!"

"So?"

"So everything makes sense if you think about it. Are you sure this is even about Snape being a death eater?" Sirius asked.

"What are you talking about?" Lily asked.

Remus stopped Sirius from making a mistake and said, "Maybe you're more angry that Sam is ignoring you and not telling you she's dating Snape."

Lily gave him a look of disbelief, "You're right. This is about my friends hiding things from me."

"Lily we aren't the only one's who hide things from you," Remus said.

_Okay, so he's right, so what?_ She thought. God she was being an idiot. Why was she so mad? She didn't even know. She just felt anger boiling up in her. This was all James Potter's fault. He could always get her so mad and he didn't even have to do anything. Just being there used to get her all worked up. It was like she was fifteen again.

She took a deep breath. She had to stop this. She couldn't let him get to her like this, "Okay you're right. Sorry. I don't know why I'm so mad."

She walked into the kitchen to get something to drink. Sirius and Remus looked at each other.

"No but we do," Sirius said so only Remus heard him.

Remus gave him a warning look, "It's her life."

**I should be doing homework but I love my reviewers that I just ****ha**** to update. You guys are really awesome and make it worth continue writing.**

**So I bet you weren't expecting that? ****Sam and ****Snape**** I actually loved writing that! It was fun. Oh and I'm not sure if you guys caught this but Lily's not in the Order not yet anyway. Basically all her friends expect for her and Sam are in the Order. In order for my story to work that's how it's going to be, for now at least. **

**I really hope you guys liked this chapter because I had fun writing it. **

**Anyway please ****review :**


	9. Chapter 9

James stood staring at the brown wood door that read C4. For the past five minutes he had been trying to getup the courage to knock and he was failing miserably. The longer he stood there the more he was believing this whole thing was a bad idea. What would stop her from jinxing him into a million pieces? Had she not made herself completely clear when she ran away from him in Diagon Ally? He thought for a brief moment that she had blushed when he grabbed her hand but it was gone so fast he wasn't sure that wasn't even sure if it had really happened.

Someone cleared their throat from behind him. His eyes shot open. Hoping to god that it wasn't Lily. How many more times must he make of fool of himself in front of her? When he turned around he saw Sirius standing there with a smirk on his face. James groaned inside, how long was he standing there? By the look on his face long enough.

"…so…" Sirius said still smirking, "What are you doing?"

"Er…" James stood there, "Uh, nothing."

"Riiight," Sirius said grinning like crazy, "Well then, I'll leave you to…nothing."

James watched Sirius enter into the apartment across from Lily's. He hoped to god Lily did not just hear Sirius and him talking. How stupid would he look if she opened the door and saw him standing there like an idiot?

James took a deep breath and knocked. He waited for two minutes and just when he thought that she wasn't home she opened the door. She started at him with shock. She obviously wasn't expecting him to be on the other side of the door.

Minutes later she was still staring at him.

"Uh, can we talk?" He asked nervously.

She just nodded and held the door open for him. He walked past her and heard her close the door. He sat nervously on the couch. It was like he was fifteen all over again. He was always nervous around Lily, he couldn't help doing stupid things whenever she was insight.

"So," He said.

She sat down on the chair opposite of the couch saying nothing, just watching him with interest. The fact that she was saying nothing only increased his nervousness. What was it about her?

"I wanted to apologize for what happened in Diagon Ally. I know that you were friends with Snape in school. We should have been more considerate when telling you."

She said nothing.

"I know that you still don't believe us about Snape but I think it's better if you stayed away from Snape and Sam. For your own protection, you know," He said quickly.

She narrowed her eyes but still said nothing.

It was driving him absolutely crazy, "So..um..I'm sorry."

He was running out of things to say, "Aren't you going to say anything?"

"What would you like me to say?" She asked.

"I dunno, something," He said.

"I don't have anything to say to you, James. You have no reason to apologize…but that doesn't mean that I agree with you," She said.

"Of course you don't," He said.

"What does that mean?" She snapped.

Okay, this was not going how he wanted it to at all but he couldn't help himself from responding, "You were best friends with Snape once. Even if you haven't been friends with him for a while you still show your loyalty towards him. You always look for the good in people…expect for me."

It was an awkward few minutes where James and Lily looked everywhere but each other. James hadn't meant to say that last part out loud but there was no denying it was true. Lily was always hard on him.

Lily had seemed to lose all her words.

"Sorry," James said. He wasn't really but he didn't want Lily even more angry with him. He was trying to get her to forgive him not chase her off, which he was doing a great job of.

He was trying to read her face but he couldn't.

"We were friends once, weren't we?" She asked quietly, "I mean before we started to go out."

James whipped his neck towards her he thought he almost got whiplash. That wasn't exactly what he was expecting. He wasn't sure how to answer either.

"Yeah, of course," James said, "And I hope we can be again."

"This is just all confusing to me, James. You have to understand that I don't trust you and that's very important to me in any kind of relationship."

James nodded, "I get that. I do. I just want a chance to show you that you can trust me."

Lily breathed deeply, "And how do I know that you won't blow it again?"

"I'd give you my word but I know you won't believe me."

"Seeing as you've used that once before and it was a lie, yeah I'd say that I wouldn't," Lily said.

"So what can I do?" James asked.

"I don't know," She said.

"Well, do I get a chance to?" He asked.

"Listen up, Potter. I'm gonna give you one chance to be my friend. Don't blow it."

James grinned, "Really? You're not joking?"

She shook her head, "No…don't make me regret it."

"I think you're being stupid," Lily said.

"And I think you're being stubborn," Nicole replied.

Lily looked outraged, "I'm not being stubborn! I'm being realistic. I know Snape, he wouldn't be involved with something like that."

"Oh puh-lease! You don't _know_ him, you _knew_ him," Nicole said rolling her eyes, "Things change, he changed. Maybe he didn't even change, maybe he was like this the whole time and you just didn't even see."

It was Lily's turn to roll her eyes, "I'm not that blind. I think I would have seen-"

"-No you wouldn't have," Nicole said cutting her off, "You always see the good in people. Well expect for Potter."

Lily narrowed her eyes, "Well I _know_ Sam and she wouldn't do anything like that!"

Nicole narrowed her eyes back, "Ugh! Fine! Whatever! Be that way but you still aren't going to talk to Sam, you can't."

"Are you kidding me? You're not my mother, so please don't tell me who I can and who I can't talk to," Lily said.

She could feel her face heating up and Nicole knew after years of watching her blow up at James that this was a bad sign, "Okay. I'm sorry. Let's not fight, we never fight. I'm just worried that _if _he is a death eater that you'll be a danger going to see Sam. It's been ages since we've talked to her you don't know who she is anymore. We don't know if she is _her_."

Lily sat back in her office chair, "This isn't exactly how I planned spending my lunch break."

Nicole who was sitting in Julia's usual chair said nothing. It wasn't unlike Lily to avoid a conversation like this. She hated being proved wrong especially when it was about proving the worst in someone.

"You know last week I told James that we could try to be friends."

Nicole nodded, "Yeah, Sirius told me."

Lily looked taken aback, "Since when did you talk to Sirius? I thought you hated him?"

"I don't hate him," Nicole said defensively.

"Yeah sure you don't."

"I don't!" Nicole said, "I just dislike the way he treats women."

Lily gave her a look of disbelief, "Oh please, if it was just that you wouldn't give him dirty looks whenever you see him or get that look your wearing now whenever someone says his name or every time you see him you give him attitude."

Nicole rolled her eyes, "You are so exaggerating but I don't have time to argue with you. I have to go to work."

Lily watched Nicole leave her office without a word. She took a deep breath when she was sure Nicole was down the hall, even though her door was shut.

Somehow, someway she was going to get her life back.

"I don't know how much longer I'm going to be able to hide this from her."

"This isn't just any secret, you can't tell her."

"But she's my best friend and she keeps asking questions."

"You have no choice but to lie or in her case avoid the questions."

"I can't, you know her! You can't just avoid questions."

"She sure can."

"Are you going to tell me that you like lying and hiding this from her?"

"No, I don't but we have no choice."

"What if we talk to Dumbledore? She could help."

"No, it's too dangerous!"

"Aw, you care."

"Of course I do."

"Whatever. She'll find out, you know she will."

"She better not from you."

With a flick of their wands the two bickering people mysteriously disappeared.

"This is the last time I'm going to tell you Evans, you either get your act together or you're out of here!"

Bolter slammed Lily's office door in anger. Lily closed her eyes and took a deep breath. Usually she would be cursing under her breath at Bolter's inability to do his work but this was her fault, completely her fault. She didn't know what was getting into her lately. She couldn't seem to concentrate on anything and lost her enthusiasm for healing. She really didn't want to take responsibility for the messed up paper work but she had to. It would have been much easier to blame her distracted mind on Sam and Snape or maybe even Nicole (Who had gone MIA on her) but she couldn't. She'd been feeling like this for a while now, her job just didn't excite her anymore. When she told this to Julia she said that Bolter sucked the life out of everyone and to not to do anything rash.

"You love your job," Julia said.

"Do I really? I mean yeah it's great helping people…I just feel drained. I don't know how to explain it."

"Maybe you're just tired of Bolter taking all the credit for your work. I don't blame you, if I was you I would have freakin kicked his ass already."

Lily shook her head, "No. I don't need credit. If you're going to be working as healer it has to be about the people, not about you. That's Bolter's problem."

Julia nodded, "Maybe you just need a vacation."

"Maybe."

"Have you talked to Lily lately?" Sirius asked James.

"Uh, yeah. Why, what's up?"

"Nothing just, uh, does she…um, does she seem different to you?"

James tilted his head to the side, "I'm not exactly the best person to be asking. I mean I just recently started talking to her again. She seems different in many ways to me but then she's kind of the same to. Why?"

"I don't know. Maybe it's nothing but she just seems kind of distant. I'm just worried about her. It's really upsetting her that Nicole isn't talking to her," Sirius said.

James frowned, "Well it's not like she's purposely not doing it. She's on that mission and she can't contact anyone. She'd be risking her life if she did."

Sirius nodded, "Yeah but we can't exactly tell her that."

"Maybe Nicole's right."

"About what?"

"About telling Lily."

Sirius shook his head, "Are you crazy?"

"Maybe."

"You know Lily. She would drop everything to do something like this and she could get hurt," Sirius said.

"Yeah but so could Nicole, so could we," James pointed out.

"It's different."

James just nodded because he understood. He knew Sirius was only trying to protect Lily but James couldn't help but feel like he was betraying Lily and lying to her once again. Hopefully this time it would turn out differently than it had in the past.

"He what!" James yelled outraged.

Lily nodded, "Yeah. He's a complete jerk. I'm kind of used to it now but it still gets to me sometimes."

Lily and James were sitting in his living room talking about work, and everything that was on their minds. It was kind of like old times again, before they started dating. And just like then there was this kind of awkwardness that came with years of hating and hurt.

They came to an awkward pause in the conversation so Lily asked the first thing that came to her mind, "So, where's Jessica?"

She didn't ask because she cared more like she wanted to know if the jealous blonde would be coming to chop Lily's head off.

James looked at anywhere but at Lily, "She's at her parents."

Thank god for him Lily was too busy looking at the pictures in the frames to notice his shifty eyes. Lily's eyes fell from one picture to the next, they were mostly of him and Jessica. Jessica looking perfect in every single one of course. Lily resisted the urge to roll her eyes and throw up.

"So things are good between you two?"

She honestly had no clue why she was asking these questions. Did she really want to know if they were happily in love? Which confused the hell out of her anyway because she had no clue what kind of guy would want someone as superficial as Jessica. But she kept her opinions to herself because they would only make her look jealous. Which she wasn't.

"Uh, Yeah."

That time she caught the hesitation in his voice, "What? Are you guys having problems."

Her heart beat a little faster and she cursed herself for pushing the subject. She was a smart girl and she knew when to drop a subject and her head was telling her to do just that. She really didn't want to know about him and Jessica. So why was she leaning forward a little bit?

"No, nothing like that."

"You don't seem so sure," Lily said gently.

Okay this would usually be the time to confesses what was ever on your mind but James was never good with things like this. His head was screaming tell her but his heart was telling him no so that he could live in the fantasy that he and Lily were friends for a little bit longer.

"We're great. I couldn't be happier."

Lily's smile was like a knife to his gut, "Good, I'm really happy for you James."

**Hey everyone! I know this is a very short chapter especially after the long wait, which I can totally explain! I was sick for two weeks, I couldn't move without being in pain. I thought I was going to die but the doctor gave me something and I finally was able to get up. Then my computer decided to stop working for a while and just when I thought I could start typing again my oldest sister got arrested for driving with a suspended license. She had a warrant out for her arrest because she got a DUI months ago and never went to court. Lucky her she got another DUI for drinking and driving. Her bail was 2500. We didn't have the money so I've been working like crazy to get her out of jail. So now that she's back home and things are sorta settling down I finally was able to get some typing done. I hope you don't hate me for making you wait and with this short chapter. It's just I have tons of homework I need to catch up on.**

**Oh and I know it probably sucks with spelling and grammar but I'm not going to double check before I post it because I have homework to do. Anyway I hope you guys didn't give up on me.**

**Please review, you guys are awesome!**


	10. Chapter 10

"I don't know which is worse," Lily said, "My two best friends not talking to me or hating my job

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter.

"I don't know which is worse," Lily said, "My two best friends not talking to me or hating my job."

"How do you know Nicole isn't on some Auror thing?" Julia asked chopping on her salad.

Lily rubbed her eyes and put down the report she was reading, "Sirius or James would have said something if she was. They wouldn't just watch me go crazy over Nicole ignoring me."

"Well, I've tried to get a hold of her to but she really doesn't seem to be around. Maybe you should ask them?" Julia said.

Lily shook her head, "I have. They haven't seen her either." Lily got a worried look, "Maybe something's happened? Do you think I should talk to her mother?"

"Yeah right, she'd kill you."

"Yeah and she'd kill me if something was wrong and I didn't do anything," Lily said.

Julia shook her head, "Nicole knows how to take care of herself. I think you're reaching here."

"Why would I reach this far? I wouldn't want anything to happen to Nicole."

Julia just sighed, "Whatever, you're going to do whatever you want to anyway."

Julia threw out her trash, "Well I'm gonna get going. I'm hoping to get out of here early today."

Lily raised hey eyebrows, "A date?"

Julia grinned, "Yeah, it's our one year anniversary! Geez I can't believe Steve and I have been together that long! It's so weird!"

Lily smiled at her friend, "Ju, I'm so happy for you."

"I know, you've said that thousands of times. If you get any happier for me, I wouldn't need the emotion myself."

Lily laughed, "Sorry, I'll try to keep my happiness to myself."

"Good. See you later."

"Bye."

Lily tried to keep her mind off of everything and on her work but it was a difficult task. She missed her best friends and she kept having that nagging feeling that something more was going on. They all seemed to know something that she didn't or it was just her mind playing games with her.

"Evans!" Bolter yelled through the door.

Lily rolled her eyes at his lack of ability to knock on a door, "Yes?"

He opened it saying, "I need you in room twelve."

He just the door with more force than necessary, "Coming," She muttered.

She got up sighing and looked at the clock. Half past four and she couldn't help but be a little upset at herself. A patient was in a couple rooms down looking for her help and she was standing here groaning that her day was not over yet.

_I'm a horrible person._

She was about to walk into room twelve when Bolter burst through the door almost knocking her down.

"About time!" He barked, "Decided to take your sweet time?"

Lily would have very much like to point out all the times that he failed to show to a room he was needed in but she kept her mouth shut. After her thoughts back in her office she felt she deserved a little punishment besides she did take more time to get there than she normally would have.

"Now get in there. I expect you two treat them quickly, there are two Aurors in there. Normally I would have one of my guys do it but seeing as their all busy."

Lily was too used to the insults to lash out at him but she couldn't help but be a little confused why would there be Aurors on this floor? This wasn't the floor for seriously hurt people.

"Right, so bed four."

Bolter stomped off looking a little putout; he was obviously looking for a fight. Lily rolled her eyes and walked into the room. The room only held four beds, two on each wall. Lily walked over to the fourth bed by the window and walked through the curtains. She noticed James and frowned, "What's going on?"

James nodded to the bed, "Oh."

"Hey, Lils," The thing said.

"Sirius!" Lily gasped, "What the hell?"

Sirius grinned or at least it looked like it. Lily couldn't tell with all the brown fur coming out of his face. James was standing at the end looking at the floor, she rounded on him, "What the hell happened?!"

James seemed to find the floor very intrusting because he didn't look at her when he said, "Er…see, he lost a bet."

Lily narrowed her eyes, "Bet?"

"Don't yell at him, Lils," Sirius said, "I'm the one that drank it."

"Drank it? Drank what?"

"Uh, see, we don't exactly know," James said daring to look up at her and regretting it immediately.

"What the hell do you mean you don't know?" Lily whispered angrily.

"I don't know," Mumbled James.

Sirius rolled his eyes, "Look here. We were having lunch and these two girls walked in. It was obvious that they were together. If you know what I mean."

Lily made a hand movement to hurry him up.

"So I bet James that I could get there numbers. I mean I am Sirius Black. What kind of girl wouldn't want my number?"

Lily ignored the question, "I don't get how this has to do with you turning into big foot."

Sirius made a face expression that Lily couldn't read through the fur, "Well James said there was no way that I'd get there number. So he bet that if I didn't get their numbers I'd have to drink this potion that we confiscated off some wizard who was selling it on the streets."

Lily gasped, "It could have been poison!"

"Yeah, sorry."

"Sorry! You should be sorry for yourself! That's so dangerous. You could have gotten yourself killed. What were you thinking?"

James looked a little guilty, "Yeah, see, this is why we were hoping you wouldn't be the one treating him."

Lily rolled her eyes, "You two have got to the most irresponsible people I know."

James cringed, "I said we were sorry, can't you just fix him?"

"I don't suppose you guys know what the potion was?" She asked already knowing the answer.

The boys looked at each other then back at her and shrugged. She put her hands through her hair and sighed, "Okay, let's just hope this is nothing serious."

She glared at Sirius who was about to make the obvious comment. She walked over to Sirius and made the usual emanation. After her finds she grabbed the clipboard and wrote down everything.

"I'm afraid that I have no clue what you drank. It must be a personal make or a dark wizard could have tampered with it. You'll need to stay overnight where they can watch you and see what happens," Lily said.

Sirius eyes went wide, it was almost comical, "What do you mean see what happens?"

Lily sighed, "Nothing bad, they're just going to watch over you and see how it goes."

Sirius groaned, "Overnight?"

Lily frowned, "Well I guess you should have thought about that before you decided to drink some potion you got off the streets."

Sirius just grumbled something she couldn't hear.

"Come on, we've got to get you to room fifteen."

"What, why?" James asked.

"Cause I said so. Come on now," Lily said walking to the door.

She turned around and found Sirius reluctantly following James to the door. She rolled her eyes and opened the door for them. As they were walking through the hallway a lot of healers and patients were giving them weird looks and she couldn't help but notice that they were keeping their distances from them to. Lily smiled a little bit hoping that Sirius learned his lesson.

"You can stop smirking now," Sirius said.

"Huh?" Lily asked innocently.

Sirius just shook his head as they stopped in front of room fifteen. She let them in and showed Sirius to the free bed. She signed the clipboard and put it at the end of the bed, "Okay I'm going to talk to the healer in charge of this room. I'll be back."

They watched her go, "That couldn't have gone better."

Sirius rolled his eyes, "Yeah, she actually responded better than I would have thought."

"Yeah well I am an idiot for making you drink that stuff. The boss is gonna be pissed when he finds out," James said.

"Okay, you're all set," Lily said walking in, "Now, I have to go. I have tons of paper work to do."

James looked at the clock on the wall, "It's 5:15. Don't you get out at Five?"

Lily nodded, "Yeah but I figure I could just take it home."

"Do you ever stop working?" James asked.

"No," Sirius answered for her.

"It just requires a lot of time," Lily said looking at James. He would know, it was one of the reasons why they had to end it. They had no time for each other. She walked over to Sirius, "You're gonna be okay. I've seen worse."

"Yeah? That's why you acted like I was the bloody monster hiding in your closet?" Sirius joked.

Lily laughed and hugged him, "Don't worry, you'll be back to your old-

"-Hey, I'm not old-"

"-self in no time," Lily finished rolling her eyes at Sirius.

She pointed at James, "Visiting hours are over at eight."

He nodded but Sirius said, "Nah, get outta here, Prongs. I think I'm going to pass out here. It's been a long, harry day."

Lily couldn't help but smile, "That was lame."

"Padfoot, you're an idiot."

"I can't believe Sirius actually drank it," Remus said shaking his head.

Lily nodded, "Somehow I'm not surprised. I mean, I would hope that he would be smarter than that but in reality this is Sirius. He'd do anything."

"Yeah, I guess."

Lily grabbed another slice of pizza and leaned back on her couch, "I'm so glad that today is over. Sirius kept begging me to let him come home."

Remus laughed, "So when do you think he'll get out?"

"Hopefully soon," Said a voice.

Remus and Lily looked up to find James standing there.

"What happened? Lily asked.

"Ugh, he's so bloody frustrating! I stayed as long as I could until I got so annoyed I made up some excuse. I had to get out of there, he kept badgering me with stupid questions and I don't know."

"Yes well, it is your fault," Lily said as someone knocked on her door.

James refrained from replying because he knew it was true, he shouldn't have made the bet in the first place. Lily got up and answered the door and was shocked to find Nicole standing on the other side of it.

"Nicole!"

Remus and James sat up straight and watched as Nicole walked through the door.

"What the hell happened to you!?" Lily asked looking at the big black eye she had.

"Oh, nothing, sorry I haven't been in touch, it was an Auror thing," Nicole said.

"I meant your black eye," Lily said shutting the door.

"It happened on my trip," She explained, "Sorry but I'm not allowed to talk about it."

Lily helped Nicole to the chair and glared at James, "So I suppose you forgot to mention all this while I was freaking out about her missing?"

James looked at the floor and Nicole said, "Don't yell at him, Lils, he didn't know about it. Top secret."

James gave Nicole a thankful look behind Lily, she smiled, "Listen, I missed all of you. You've got to tell me everything's that's happened."

"And I think that's our cue to leave," Remus said, "We're so not sitting in on girl talk."

"Yeah, I think I've had enough of complaining from Sirius," James said getting up after Remus.

Lily and Nicole threw pillows at the boys as the left.

Lily smiled, "You won't believe what's happed to Sirius."

Nicole grinned and jumped from the chair to the couch, "Do tell."

"I think it's time to talk to Sam," Lily told Nicole two days later. Her bruise had gone down nicely, thanks to Healer Lily.

Nicole chocked on her drink, "What?"

"She's our best friend, she obviously needs us now."

Nicole lowered her eyes, "What do you mean obviously? Have you talked to her?"

Lily sighed, "No! I just think that she must be lonely and I feel bad abandoning her like this."

"Um, maybe you weren't there but she was the one who abandoned us," Nicole pointed out, "She got mad, she slammed the door and shut us out. Besides we can't talk to her unless she's done with that slime-I mean that boyfriend of hers."

"I don't care who she's dating. I'm going to talk to her. Tomorrow. You can come with me or you can stay behind, it's up to you," Lily said stubbornly.

Nicole sighed, "Ugh, fine."

"I can't believe we're doing this," Nicole said trying to keep up with Lily's purposeful strides, "And will you please slow down!"

Lily stopped unaware that she was going so fast, "Sorry. It's just, she's not at her house, not at her mom's, where could she be?"

Nicole looked at Lily not sure that she wanted to tell her this, "Lily why do you need to talk to her so bad? How do you know that this person is even Sam anymore? We're in the middle of a war here."

"I know! That's why I want to find her!" Lily snapped.

"Listen Lily, I should tell you something," Nicole said looking around to make sure no one was around. As it was the day no one was around. Nicole pulled Lily over to a bench.

"What is it?"

Nicole took a deep breath and said, "Listen, I think you should know something about Sam."

Nicole looked into Lily's eyes; she was so unaware of things around her. If she only really knew how bad this war was, but that was the point of not telling her about the Order, wasn't it? To keep her innocent. If Nicole told Lily the things she's done she wasn't so sure Lily would stay by her side anymore.

"Just tell me, Nicole, no more secrets," Lily said.

"Okay, Sam's in some trouble. She, uh, she's the main suspect in a murder investigation. The head Aurors have been on the case for a while now and everything is pointing to her."

Lily shook her head, she didn't believe it. Nicole put her hand on Lily's, "Lily listen, she's dangerous, I can't let you walk into something like this."

"She's our friend. We made a promise to each other that no matter what happens we are always friends first."

"This is different!" Nicole said.

"No, it's not. How could believe something like this? We shared the same dorm with her! She never once showed that she was capable of murder! She's our friend, Nicole."

Nicole looked at the ground guilt bubbling in her stomach, "Okay, you're right…she's at Snape's"

Nicole regretted the words coming out of her mouth the second she said them. Lily pulled out her wand and apparated on the spot.

"Lily! No!"

_God, what have I done?_

Alright I know I haven't updated in forever! I'm so sorry! Please don't hate me, okay I probably deserve it. Needless to say but I've been extremely busy but since my allergies were acting up like crazy I decided to take this day for myself and update. You can thank my mom for this. I've been taking nightly walks with her around the park and whichever of those pretty flowers don't exactly like my nose and throat at the moment. But I swear to you I'll try to update faster like I was doing before everything got so screwed up!

I really hope you like this chapter. Please review and tell me what you think! I know this one didn't have to do with James and Lily but that's coming up and worth the wait.


	11. Chapter 11

DISCLIMER: I DON'T OWN HARRY POTTER…and if I did I defiantly wouldn't be writing fanfiction…

­­Okay so I could have had this up last night but for some strange reason it wasn't showing anything in my stories. So you get it today...

Drum roll please! Ha ha just kidding…

* * *

Lily apparated a couple blocks from Spinner's End. She didn't know what kind of security charms or spells it might have and she definitely didn't want to apparate in the middle of one. She looked around as she walked; everything pretty much looked the same. When she was younger she would walk these streets at night whenever she and Petunia would fight. It always helped clear her head but now things were just too screwed up for a walk to fix everything.

As hard as it was to imagine Severus as a Dark Wizard it was even harder to imagine Sam as one. She shared her clothes and secrets with this woman; there was no way that Sam could have killed anyone. They had it wrong, maybe if she could get Sam to talk to her she could help clear her name. It was the only way to get her best friend back.

She walked quickly up the hill and pulled out her wand. She stopped when Spinner's End was in view. She couldn't think of any spells that could protect her against security spells. There was only one way to find out if there were any spells, she'd just have to walk through. Lily took a deep breath and started to walk slowly up to the house. She took a breath with every step.

She took a deep breath when she made it up to the door. Then all the sudden she felt a jerk and she was facing the side of the house. She felt someone holding her to the siding. Her heart was beating fast hoping that whoever it was wasn't going to hurt her. The person jerked her around and Lily saw a very angry Nicole. Lily sighed as her heart beat started to go back to normal.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Nicole hissed.

"What does it look like?" Lily whispered back.

"I tell you Sam's a murder and your solution is to go walking right into their domain?" Nicole asked.

Lily had never seen her so angry, "Nicole, do you even listen to yourself? We know Sam."

Nicole shook her had angrily, "No we don't! We know the old Sam, not this one."

"It's the same girl."

"No, it's not. Want to know why she was angry with me? Because she knew that I was catching on to her!" Nicole said.

"No, she was mad about Sirius," Lily argued quietly.

"That was just a cover!" Nicole said.

"You're lying and do want to know how I know you're lying? It's because you hate Sirius. You kept giving him dirty looks. I know you better than you think I do, Nicole. You were generally angry about Sirius and Sam. You really thought that he was going to end up hurting her. So I know for a fact that you didn't know anything about this then."

Nicole sighed, "I do know. I was just refusing to believe it."

"How can I believe you when you won't even tell me why you hate Sirius?"

"This doesn't matter right now!" Nicole said stomping her foot, "You're about it walk into a murder's presences."

Lily rolled her eyes, "Fine, don't tell me. I'm going to go in then."

"Then tell me! Tell me what you've been hiding from me. I thought we were best friends?" Lily asked.

"I can't."

"Why not?" Lily asked frustrated.

"Because there's nothing to tell."

"I'm sorry you feel that way," Lily said and she slid away from her.

"Lily, I can't go in there. I can't blow my cover," Nicole said.

Lily nodded, "That's your choice."

"Please Lily, don't do this," Nicole begged, "I can't stand by and watch you get hurt."

"I won't."

Lily straightened her shirt and knocked. It was two heart pounding moments that Nicole begged God that no one was home. She kept her back straight against the siding praying that Lily wouldn't get hurt. If she did it would be all her fault and she knew a lot of people would be angry with her. She could think of two guys in particular that would kill her. Nicole heard the door slid open and she held her breath.

"Lily?" Sam asked confused, "What are you doing here?"

"I need to talk to you," Lily said.

_Please Lily don't go in_

Sam looked at Lily deciding on if she should let her in. She opened the door wider and stood aside. Nicole chanced a look and saw Lily walk in. Nicole never felt fear like that in her life. She had to get help.

* * *

Nicole knocked hard on James' house door but no one was answering. She cursed and then groaned when Jessica answered the door. Jessica looked Nicole up and down and then smiled that fake smile of hers, "Is there something I can help you with?"

Nicole narrowed her eyes, "I need to talk to James."

Jessica tilted her head to the side, "He's busy right now."

"Yes well I think he's going to want you to get him," Nicole said.

Jessica smiled, "We're busy right now. We're making our wedding plans." She held up her left hand showing her ring.

Nicole frowned at the familiar ring, "Listen, I don't fucking care that you two are getting married! You either get James or I'll get him myself!"

Jessica's eyes went wide, "Who the hell-

"-Nicole?" James asked coming to the door.

"Yes," Nicole said walking past Jessica, "I need to talk to you," She looked at Jessica, "In private."

James looked at Jessica, "We'll be in my office."

Jessica just smiled and nodded.

Nicole rolled her eyes and followed James down the hall. When he closed the door behind them he said, "So, I guess you know."

"Huh?" Nicole asked confused.

"About Jess and I," He said sitting down, "Wanna sit?"

Nicole shook her head, "I don't care about you and the witch, no offence. I need to talk to you."

James frowned and straightened up, "Nicole? What's wrong?"

Nicole paced and than sat down, her knees banging up and down, "I've done something bad."

He leaned forward, "What? Whatever it is we can figure it out."

Nicole shook her head, "We can't."

"Just tell me," James said.

"It's about Lily," Nicole said, "I might have told her about Sam."

James stood up, "What do you mean might have?"

Nicole looked at the floor, "I did."

"And what happened?" James asked rubbing his face with his hands.

"What do you think? She went crazy and went to see her!" Nicole said.

"How would she know where to go?" James asked frowning at Nicole.

Nicole's knees started shaking faster, "I told her."

"WHAT!"

"That's not the worst part."

"How could it get any worse than this?" James asked walking around his office.

"She's inside Snape's house right now with Sam."

James froze and stared at Nicole, "What?" James' heart started racing, he couldn't believe it. Not Lily.

Nicole just nodded, "I can't go in there."

"I can't either."

Nicole nodded, "Someone has to do something."

"Dumbledore-

"Will kill us," Nicole finished.

James nodded, "Okay, I'm going."

Nicole stood up and blocked him, "What? You can't."

He pushed her aside, "Yeah and if I don't go Lily's dead."

He couldn't think of anything else to do, if Lily was in trouble he was going to go save her. No one could stop him.

"She doesn't believe me."

"Yeah well I'd hate it if the last thing she saw was one of her best friend's killing her."

* * *

Sam stood with her back to Lily. Lily was trying to tell her heart to stop racing that it was only Sam but now that she was inside the house doubts were flashing across her mind. Lily opened her mouth to say something but something smashed against her head and she saw black.

Lily slowly opened her eyes confused as to why she was in pain. Seeing white dots she closed her eyes. Slowly her memory came back to her. She opened her eyes wide looking around. Her eyes weren't used to the dark and she was finding it hard to make out shapes. As her eyes got accustomed to the dark she was able to see that they were in some kind of bed room but there was no bed only chairs. Someone moved in the corner and Lily strained her eyes.

Sam turned slowly around and Lily was shocked to find Sam pointing her wand at her, "You really shouldn't have come."

Lily tried to grab her wand but was shocked to find that invisible robes were holding her to a chair, "I wouldn't move. You'll only hurt yourself more."

"I don't understand," Lily said her voice a little scratchy.

Sam rolled her eyes, "God, Lily, you really need to open your eyes. I mean this whole 'look for the good in people' is really disgusting. You never saw what was in front of your face the whole time."

"No, I don't believe it. You were never like this," Lily said. She couldn't think straight her head was throbbing.

"Lily, Lily, Lily," Sam said shaking her head, "You really are naive sometimes and that's what I counted on."

Lily started thinking; there should have been some kind of sign but she couldn't think of any. All her memories of this woman were nothing but good times, except for this one, of course. If this was really Sam, Lily would have seen it. No person was this blind.

Sam just stood there with her wand pointing at Lily, "It was rather easy, wasn't it?"

Lily didn't answer, she couldn't.

"Do you want to know what I love?" Sam asked getting closer, "That even though I have you tied up to a chair and pointing a wand at you, you're still looking for the good in me."

She laughed, but it was a Sam laugh. It was different, evil.

"How did this happen? Why? Because I went to some dance with Sirius?"

"No, that was just a cover for me, a pretty good one to. I needed a reason to detach myself from you guys and to think you were stupid enough to fall for it. Nicole wasn't as easy but I had her going for a while."

Lily couldn't believe this was happening, "Someone will come for me."

She laughed again, "Who? The friends you can't trust? I mean come on; you know they're hiding something from you."

Lily face fell, "How do-

"-know? Please Lily, I've been watching you," She said, "I know a lot more than you think."

"This is crazy, Sam. We've been friends since our first year at Hogwarts. You can't tell me that we weren't even really friends," Lily pleaded.

"That's cute, you begging me for your life."

Lily looked at her friend. She was so different from the Sam she knew. It was like someone had kicked her in the stomach. She realized Sam was gone and she had to start thinking about how to get out alive and on her own. Nicole told her not to go in that she wouldn't be able to go in after her. She made the mistake of not listening and she had to pay the price.

"I'm not begging," Lily said, "You want to kill me? Then go head, you don't have the guts."

Sam narrowed her eyes, "That's brave of you, Lils."

"Only my friends are allowed to call me that."

She laughed, "Friends that you can't trust? Be honest, Lily, you never saw this coming. Who's to say that your secret loving friends aren't also like me?"

Lily didn't answer because she didn't know, she just had faith.

"I just wanted to help you."

"You're the one who needs the help," Sam said. She turned around and looked at something,

"It looks like I have a visitor that I have to take care of." She looked down at Lily and smiled, "Now be a good little girl while I'm gone, not that you've got much choice. I'll be back soon. So use your time remaining on Earth wisely. Oh and I have your wand so don't try any funny business."

Lily glared at Sam. Sam walked behind her and walked out. She struggled against the ropes but it was useless. Not that she thought she really had a chance, she was dead. Even if she did get out of the chair she assumed Sam would have sealed the door. She could only hope that Nicole knew how sorry she was.

She started to struggle again. Even if she didn't have a wand she wasn't just going to sit here and wait to be killed. She jerked and the chair tipped over.

"Ow, bloody hell."

She kept struggling even though part of her knew it was pointless. She couldn't even remember when Sam left. How much time did she have left? She heard the door open slowly and sat still holding her breath. Whoever it was wasn't Sam because they didn't seem to know their way around the room. They walked right into Lily. Lily sucked in her breath.

"Lily?" The person bent down.

Lily knew that voice, "James?"

"Shh, I'm going to get you out of here."

With a flick of his wand she was let go. She threw her arms around him, "Thank you, I thought I was dead."

"Lils, you're bleeding."

"Yeah," She said putting her hand to her head.

"Come on, we gotta go."

"What about Sam?" Lily asked.

James looked at her, "Are you kidding? Even after she tried to kill you? You seriously still want to talk to her?"

"She's my friend," Lily said looking at the floor.

James sighed, "Lily, you saw her, your friend is gone. All that's left is evil."

She nodded slowly, "Just get me out of here."

"Yeah okay, where's your wand?" He asked looking around.

"She has it," Lily said.

He groaned, "Shit, okay just hold on to me."

"Don't take me home," Lily said as she grabbed on to him.

He frowned, "Huh? Why don't you want to go home?"

"Just please don't."

He nodded, took out his wand and apparated them to his house.

* * *

James and all his brilliance didn't think about his fiancée who was sitting on the couch looking over wedding magazines when they apparated in. The look on her face was enough to tell him she was angry about Lily's presence. He couldn't blame her a hundred percent for her anger but in his defense he did tell her he was going to help a friend and Lily was a friend.

"Jamie, you didn't tell me you were going to bring a friend back," She said ever so sweetly. Her eyes flashed to Lily's face, "You're bleeding."

He didn't point out the fact that it was his house and he really didn't have to tell her when he was having guests over, "Yeah we ran into a little trouble."

He looked at Lily, "Can you go wait in the bedroom?" He wanted to get a look at her head and wipe the blood off her face.

"Oh, but wait now," Jessica said in her best innocent voice, "I was just looking at wedding dresses and now that…er…sorry I forgot your name." She looked at Lily expectantly.

"Lily, her name is Lily," James said tensing up. This wasn't happening, not now, "Look she should really get some sleep."

Jessica smiled and ignored him, "Sorry, bad memory. Anyway like I said I was looking at wedding dresses, I'm sure James told you we were getting married." She flashed the engagement ring and James repressed the urge to throw up, "since you're here I was hoping you can give me your opinion on my top three. James here is completely no use."

James felt Lily tense up and he had never felt worse in his life as he did at that moment, "I'm really not an expert on these kinds of things," Lily said, "But congratulations."

"Oh, you don't have to be an expert, just look at them for me?" Jessica asked.

It was like a staring war between Lily and Jessica. It was like time froze. Then Lily sighed, "Okay, sure. I'd love to help."

It didn't feel right to watch Lily and Jessica walk over to the couch and talk about wedding stuff. Not after what Lily just went through, she should have been going to sleep or something. It was his fault he was putting this stress on her. He let it go on for two more minutes, "Okay, I'm sorry girls but I'm going to have to break this up. Lily has to get some sleep."

James brought Lily to his bedroom, "I'll be right back."

It wasn't the easiest task to explain to Jess why she had to go home but he knew that Lily wasn't going to open up to him with her there and there was no way he could explain himself to Lily either. Then he felt worse because he realized he owed Lily an explanation.

He went to the bathroom and out a wash cloth under warm water. He sighed as he walked down the hall way to his room. When he opened the door he found Lily standing over his bed just staring at it, it made him really uncomfortable.

"She looks just like her," Lily said, "You know, the girl I caught you with."

James froze, he did know that this conversation was going to happen; he just didn't think it was going to be tonight or was that he was hoping it wasn't going to be tonight? For his own selfish reasons he really just wanted to forget that it ever happened, "Lily I'm sorry. I mean I'm really sorry."

She turned to him, "When we ran into you guys at the zoo I really thought that it was her but then I looked closer and I realized it wasn't."

"You should sit," James said, "Let me wipe the blood off your face."

It looked like it took great effort for her to sit down and guilt just ate him up inside. He kneeled in front of her and started to dab away the blood, "I really never meant to hurt you. All I wanted was your trust back and I realize that I've screwed up a lot but-

He stopped because he realized tears were falling down her face, "Lily, no, please don't cry."

"I can't help it. I'm losing everyone."

"No, you're not," He said wiping her tears, "You have Nicole, Sirius, and me."

"Then why do I always feel like you guys are hiding something from me?" She asked more tears falling.

He took his thumb and brushed away a tear, "Maybe it's just because we're trying to protect you."

"I don't need to be protected. I need friends that I can trust," She said.

He sighed, "I know."

He looked up at her and before he realized what she was doing she leaned down and brushed her lips across his. It was the most amazing ten seconds of his life but she pulled away all too soon. Her eyes wide with fear.

Damn it, why was he such an idiot?

* * *

_So there is the eleventh chapter! I hoped you liked the James and Lily part. I enjoyed writing it and that's only the beginning! And I don't know if you noticed but I've updated rather quickly, all for you of course! : ) I hope to keep this up because I want this story done before the 7__th__ of June because I'll be leaving to go on vacation. I'd really hate to leave you guys hanging because I won't be doing any writing when I'm in Florida._

_Anyway please review! I enjoy all kinds! _


	12. Chapter 12

DISCLIAMER: I DON'T OWN HARRY POTTER…

**DISCLIAMER: I DON'T OWN HARRY POTTER…blah blah blah…**

**I want to thank all of you who reviewed, you guys really are awesome! I was having a horrible day until I logged on and saw all your reviews! I'm going to start trying to respond to them. I couldn't before because my finals but I am now on summer break, so I should have more time. Thanks again.**

Lily was staring at the wall for what seemed like hours but probably only twenty minutes. She didn't remember when she fell asleep but guilt kept her up pretty late. She couldn't believe that she let her emotions get out of control like that. What was she thinking last night? How could she kiss James like that? And what the hell was that crying about? She was supposed to be over all this, she was supposed to be stronger than this.

She could hear James in the kitchen but she couldn't get up and face him. The worst part was that she didn't have a wand to apparate with. So she couldn't sneak out, she'd have to face him. It served her right, after all that yelling at him for being a cheater she goes and kisses him when he has a fiancée. A fiancée for crying out loud! This was just so screwed up.

She tensed as she heard the door open. He walked over to the bed and stared at her. He sighed and walked around the other side. She snapped her eyes shut. He felt the bed sink and as he laid down, "Lily, I think I know you well enough to know when you're sleeping and when you're faking."

Lily sighed and opened her eyes. He was lying on his side staring at her. She groaned and pulled the covers over her face. Her voice was all muffled when she said, "Please don't look at me."

"Come on, Lils, talk to me," He said.

"No."

"You're being childish."

"I don't care."

"Li-ly, I thought I'd wait till you came out to me but when it took you this long I figured you were hiding from me. It looks like I was right."

"Good for you."

He sighed and tugged on the covers, "You can't hide forever."

"Can so."

He laughed and grabbed the covers and pulled them down, "See, it's not so hard."

"Why are you being nice?"

"Why are you being so stubborn?"

"I'm not stubborn."

He rolled his eyes, "We're not fighting about this right now."

"Why not?"

"Why do you want me to yell at you so bad?" He asked confused.

"Because I deserve it!" She said.

He saw that her hand was gathering the covers again so he grabbed her hand. He looked her in the eyes, "I'm not mad at you. You were stressed, you were held hostage and you were emotional. I get it. I'm not judging you for it."

"Yeah, well you should."

He sighed, they were getting no where, "Okay look I'd thought we'd get you a new wand today."

"I like the one I had," Lily said.

"Yeah but you can't have that one," He pointed out.

Lily pouted, "But-

"-no buts," James said getting up. Lily took the opportunity to pull the covers over her head again. James sighed, "Lily, come on. You need a new wand. I can't have you walking around with out one."

"I have work," She said protesting. She shot up, "Oh my god, I'm late!" He watched her jump off the bed. She glared at him, "Why didn't you wake me up earlier? Bolter is going to have my head!"

James rolled his eyes, "Lils, calm down. I already owled your boss, I told him you wouldn't be coming in today. Besides how are you going to help anyone without a wand?"

She stopped moving, "Fine but I'll have you know that there are some patients that I don't need a wand with, only antidotes."

"Good now breakfast and to Diagon Ally," James said gently pushing her to the kitchen.

"We have to go to my apartment. I have to change."

"Okay."

James and Lily apparated to Lily's apartment and found Nicole passed out on the couch. It looked like she had been there for a while. Lily looked up at James quizzically and whispered, "What's Nicole doing on my couch?"

He just shrugged.

Lily got close to Nicole and started to shake her gently, "Nicky…wake up."

Nicole opened her eyes and looked confusedly at Lily. Then reality set in and Nicole jumped up and grabbed on to Lily. Lily shocked at being attack screamed, "Ah, let me go!"

"Lily! Oh my god! Thank god! I thought that you were dead!" Nicole said letting her go, "It's all my fault, I shouldn't have let you go. I shouldn't have told you!"

"Calm down, Nicole! I'm fine," Lily said.

Nicole sat down and took a deep breath, "What happened? Why did it take you guys forever?"

James looked guiltily at the floor, "Er, it didn't, not exactly."

Nicole narrowed her eyes, "What do you mean not exactly?"

"Well, I was going to take her home last night but she didn't want to be alone. So I took her to my house," James explained.

Nicole jumped up again but this time headed for James, "Are you telling me that I stayed up to make sure Lily was alive for nothing? That you actually got her out just fine and didn't bother to tell the person who told you Lily was in trouble! What the hell happened in there?" Nicole was breathing hard by the time she finished her yelling.

James and Lily hurriedly told her what happened to a glaring Nicole.

"Nicky, don't be mad at, James," Lily said, "I'm the one who asked him to take me to his house."

"Don't Nicky me! I'm sorry that you had to go through that, you know that. I mean I would have been terrified but seriously you saw how much I didn't want you to go in there. The least you could have done was owl me or something," She said giving James a look, "Just to let me know you're okay."

Guilt was settling itself in Lily's stomach; Nicole was right, "I'm sorry, really, I am."

Nicole's face softened, "It's okay. I get it."

Lily sighed, "Okay now that that's done I'm going to go shower and change."

James and Nicole watched Lily walk to her bedroom at the end of the hall. Once her bedroom door was closed Nicole smacked James on the back of his head. He winced rubbing it, "What was that for?"

"You know what," She said going to the kitchen for some food.

"Can you just please save me the headache and tell me?" James said sitting down at the table.

"I don't even know where to start James. One, what the hell were you thinking? You brought her to your house?" Nicole said looking through the cabinets.

"She didn't want to be alone!" He said defending himself.

"I repeat, you brought her to _your_ house?"

"She said she didn't want to go home," He said.

"Alright, two, why isn't she at work?" Nicole said, "Her boss is going to have a fit. I'm surprised she isn't kicking and screaming to get there," She said making coffee.

James thought about it, "Well, she was kinda freaking out but she actually took it quite well."

Nicole looked at him strangely, "Really?"

James nodded.

"Okay fine, why is she changing? What are you guys doing?" Nicole said.

"Well Sam took her wand, so we were going to go get her a new one," James said.

Nicole dropped the sugar, "What?!"

"Er, we didn't tell you?" James said.

She glared at him, "No you didn't tell me!"

"It's okay! We're going to get her a new one," James said reassuringly, "Today."

"Okay fine, three, and exactly what are we going to tell Dumbledore?" Nicole asked. James looked up at her like she was crazy, "You know we have to tell him, right?"

"Yeah," He mumbled.

Nicole gave a small smile, "James, you're such a sucker."

"I'm going to try to take that as a compliment."

"Whatever."

Lily sat examining her new wand at Nicole and Adam's place. She wasn't exactly sure how she felt about her new wand. It's not like it felt wrong but it felt different. She was very fond of her old wand and would have rather fought Sam for it than gone to get a new one. She placed the wand in the middle of the table. If she dug a little deeper it wasn't just the wand that was upsetting her so much. She couldn't get that stupid kiss off her mind; a kiss that lasted only ten second wasn't worth all these thoughts.

Nicole was trying to cheer her up by telling her the perks of a new wand, it wasn't working very well. After several failed attempts she sighed and said, "So how was sleeping at James' and don't lie to me Lily."

"It was fine."

"I thought I said don't lie to me?" Nicole asked.

"Bugger off," She said.

Nicole rolled her eyes, "Very mature."

"It was fine after Jessica left."

Nicole froze, "Oh, she was still there?"

Lily nodded, "Yeah, and she was exactly thrilled to see me either not that I was thrilled to see her."

"So…you know…"

Lily nodded, "Yeah…"

"It's okay to be upset," Nicole said putting her hand over Lily's.

Lily moved her hand, "I'm _not_ upset. I'm happy for them."

"Lily, I'd be upset! I am upset!"

Lily gave her friend a strange look, "Why are upset?"

"Because I spent hours looking with James for that ring for you, that's why," Nicole said.

"You never told me that."

"I believe there was a 'no Potter talk' rule once you guys broke up," Nicole said, "It's not like I could have told you over coffee and donuts."

"Why would you go looking for a ring with him anyway?" Lily asked.

Nicole shrugged, "You didn't exactly tell me you guys were having problems. I assumed everything was great between the two of you. I seriously was planning on an engagement party for you two when you came to tell me you broke up with him. Anyway that's beside the point that was _your_ ring."

Lily looked at the table hard, "Well, it's _her's_ now."

Nicole rolled her eyes, "Well if you aren't going to bash the bastard in the head, I will."

"No, don't say anything to him. He wouldn't have given it to her if he didn't want her to have it," Lily said looking Nicole in the eyes, "Please."

"Fine," She snapped.

"Nicole, I mean it."

"Whatever," Nicole said.

They went back to staring at Lily's wand again. Lily's mind went back to the kiss and was wondering if she should tell Nicole about it. Part of her wanted to get it off her mind and out in the open but then another part wanted to keep it a secret.

"What are you thinking about?" Nicole asked.

"Huh? What?" Lily asked.

"What are you thinking?"

"Why?" Lily asked.

"Dunno, it looks like you're having some kind of inner struggle," Nicole said.

"I…um…"

"Spit it out," Nicole said, "I'm not getting any younger."

"You wanna here this or not?" Lily asked.

Nicole scooted closer, "Man, this must be good."

Lily sighed, "I kissed James."

Nicole's eyes went wide and her mouth dropped, "What!"

Lily nodded, "It was really an accident." Nicole's eyebrows went up. "Okay so it wasn't really but I don't know, it just happened. I wasn't even thinking all the sudden I just leaned down and kissed him. God I'm such an idiot."

"Did he kiss you back?" Nicole asked.

"What? No, well…I didn't really give him the chance to. I realized what I was doing and quickly pulled away," Lily said nervously, "It's so stupid but I just can't stop thinking about it. I mean what if I didn't pull away? Would he have kissed me back?"

Nicole didn't say anything. She just sat studying her friend.

"Well, aren't you going to say something?" Lily asked twisting her hands together.

"When are you going to give this up?" Nicole asked.

"Give what up?" She asked confused.

"This game or whatever it is you have going," Nicole said.

"I have no clue what you're talking about," Lily said.

"Ugh, Lily, seriously are you that blind?"

"Um, apparently because I'm completely lost."

"You still have feelings for James," Nicole said throwing her hands in the air.

It was Lily's turn for her mouth to drop, "What! I do not!"

Nicole rolled her eyes, "Whatever, I'm not going to fight about this but these kinds of things don't just happen. You don't just accidentally kiss the guy you used to be completely in love with."

"Nicole, you have no clue what you're talking about."

"That's your opinion."

Nicole sat next to James listening to Dumbledore finish speaking. When he was done and Nicole was sure everyone else was too busy to listen to them she said, "So, Lily kissed you huh?"

She knew Lily told her not to talk to James about this but she was doing Lily a favor, she was not about to let Lily fall for James again. Well that is if she ever really got over James, Nicole wasn't so sure. All she knew was that she wasn't going to let Lily's heart break twice from the same guy.

"Oh, she told you?" James asked.

Nicole nodded, "Oh yeah, lover boy."

"So you're probably mad at me," James said.

"Oh yeah," Nicole said causally.

James stared at her in shock, he wasn't really expecting her to be mad at him, "But-but I didn't do anything! She kissed me."

She looked at him like he was stupid, "That's not why I'm mad at you, you idiot! I'm mad because of that ring you gave your dear fiancée."

James looked down at his hands, "Oh yeah."

She growled in frustration, "James you're the biggest idiot I know."

He nodded, agreeing with her, "Yeah I know. I never meant to ask her. I was scared. I don't know what happened. She was all I had."

She placed her hands on the table in front of them, "Listen James, I'm only going to say this once. You cannot kiss nor let Lily kiss you again. I mean it James Potter, not once."

James looked up at her, "Okay, I get it."

"No I don't think you do. It was hell the first five months after you two broke up. Lily would never admit that she was heart broken but we all knew she was. She refused to talk about it, wouldn't show any sign of hurt, and it was just bloody frustrating. I was so happy the morning that Lily came to my apartment without a red blotchy face from crying all night." Nicole sat there letting it sink in and then asked, "Why'd she break up with you James?"

"I'm not going to tell you if she didn't."

Nicole smiled sweetly it made James disgusted because it reminded him of Jessica's smiles, "Tell me."

James sighed, "She'll hate me…I can't."

"Oh just tell me," She snapped, "I know Lily. She wouldn't just break up with you just because you guys never had time for each other or because you asked her to marry you. I never pressed it before because I was afraid it would upset Lily more but I need to know now."

"Ugh, fine…I, um, I cheated on her," James said.

Nicole stared in shock and her mouth dropped open, "You what?"

"I cheated on her," He said.

Nicole got up, slapped him in the face, and walked away. James sat there and massaged his cheek.

_Can't say that I didn't deserve that_

Lily was sitting with Remus when Nicole apparated in looking very much like she did in their forth year when Sirius shrunk her school uniform, in other words she was not happy at all.

Remus looked up at her apprehensively, "Er, hey Nicole."

"Hey, Remus," Nicole said.

"Uh, what's wrong?" Lily asked.

"What's going on? Well, let's see, instead of finding out things from my best friend I'm finding them out from James Potter," Nicole said tapping a finger on her chin.

"Um, I think I should get going. I told Sirius I would stop by the hospital to see him," Remus said getting up.

Lily slapped a hand on her head, "Sirius! I totally forgot," She said getting up.

Nicole pushed her back down, "Not until we talk."

Lily gave Remus a 'help me' look. He shrugged, "Later." Lily groaned.

Nicole sat down, a little more in control of her emotions, "Lily, why didn't you tell me that James cheated on you?"

Lily looked at the coffee table in the middle of the front room, "He told you?"

"Don't go getting mad at him, I made him tell me. You know how I can be," Nicole said, "But really, I thought I was your best friend."

"You are!" Lily said looking at her.

"I could have helped you," Nicole said, "What are friends for if not to help you get over your heart break?"

"I felt stupid."

"I'll be the judge of that, tell me what happened," Nicole said.

Lily sighed, "Well I don't know. He cheated on me but I just loved him so much. I really couldn't see myself without him and he begged me so much to stay with him. I just kept thinking, after all that you're just going to break up with him? So, I stayed with him but then I found myself slowly detaching myself from him. Longer hours spent studying, more girls night, and fewer nights at his house. He must have realized what I was doing and panicked, grabbed you and bought a ring. When he proposed, I couldn't believe it. I had to say no, I didn't trust him and that's why I think I broke up with him. What's a relationship without trust? I couldn't even trust him when he said he'd been with Sirius all night and Sirius could never lie to me. He really is a bad liar."

Nicole squeezed her hand, "Why didn't you tell me before?"

"I didn't want you to think I was stupid for staying with him after he cheated on me. I mean I already felt stupid I didn't need you guys judging me as well."

"You're not stupid and I'd never judge you for that," Nicole said, "James was the stupid one, not you."

"The thing that bothers me the most is we weren't even having problems when he cheated on me. I thought that we were perfectly fine…until I came over a found him in bed with some blonde," Lily said.

Nicole's face dropped, Lily said it _bothers_ her not _bothered _her. As much as she saw this coming she had no clue what to do. It's not like they could lock them in a closet together like at Hogwarts. James was getting married, he was off limits.

**Well I wanted to get this up last night but I was having problems logging in, I don't know if anyone else did but I swear I'm not lying!**

**I realize that there was no Lily and James in this one but all this was necessary. It got Lily and James' reason for breaking up out in the open. As you can probably tell Nicole is very assertive. She needs to be for Lily and James' sake. **

**Someone asked in review how James got into Snape's house. Well to be honest he just knocked, like Lily did. I see James at being faster with his wand than Sam. If you guys really want I can put like a flashback of him rescuing her. Just let me know but if you do I can't promise that it'll be in the next chapter because I'm almost done writing it.**

**Anyway I really hope you enjoyed this chapter and please review. **


	13. Chapter 13

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter

* * *

Nicole stood jabbing Sirius on his side. She could tell that he was awake and was just ignoring her. She was getting angry and the angrier she got the harder the jab. Sirius rolled over, "If you don't get up I'm going to stick my wand up your-

Sirius sat up, "Okay, what do you want?"

She sat down on the chair next to him, "Well I'm here for Lily's sake and I guess a little for James' to." Sirius raised an eyebrow and Nicole laughed, "You look rather horrible, you know that?"

"Very funny, I'll have you know that it was twice this bad when it happened," Sirius said, "I'll be getting out soon and I'll be as good looking as I was, if not twice as much."

Nicole rolled her eyes, "Sure…dog boy."

Sirius eyes lit up, "Hey maybe that's it! Maybe my anim-

Nicole slapped her hand over his mouth and snapped, "You're an idiot, shut up."

Sirius made a face at her and shoved her hand away, "Whatever, what do you want?"

"I've recently learned some things and I need your help."

"Well you're going to have to tell me or I can't really help, can I?" Sirius said, "But then again I don't see how I can help while stuck here. As a matter of fact why should I help you?"

Nicole banged her hands down on the bed, "Because this isn't about me like I said, it's about Lily and James. I know you're close with both of them so stop being a child."

"Alright, fine, what's going on?" Sirius asked.

"Well, I've found out that _your _best friend cheated on _my_ best friend when they were going out," Nicole said, "And-

"What?" Sirius yelled, "You're lying. James would never have cheated on Lily."

"Oh yes, I came all the way over here to tell you that even though it wasn't true! Rats, you saw right through my act! God, Sirius and they tell me you aren't smart," Nicole said sarcastically.

"Who told you I'm not smart?" He asked surprised.

She rolled her eyes, "It doesn't matter the point is that your best friend cheated on my best friend and I don't think that Lily is over it either."

Sirius was quiet for a couple minutes, "So…you're not joking?"

"NO!"

Sirius held up his hands, "Okay, okay! I was just checking. I'm so going to kill him."

"No, you can't say anything, Sirius, I mean it. Besides that's over and done with, it's been over a year. The reason I came here is because I really think that Lily still has feelings for James, she's just not admitting it to herself or anyone else."

"So what are we supposed to do? Make her realize it?" Sirius asked.

"No, we don't want her to have feelings for James," Nicole said, "Why the hell would we want to put her through that again?"

"No, this is perfect! Once James sees that Lily still loves him he'll realize he still has feelings for her!" Sirius said sitting up straight.

"No you imbecile! I'm not putting Lily through that. He's getting married!" Nicole pointed out.

"He'll break it off," Sirius said, "Which is my point. Why would I want him to marry the white witch when he could get married to Lily?"

"Black, if you don't shut up I'm going to curse you so bad that they'll never be able to put you back," Nicole said, "We are not trying to get them together."

"Why not?"

"Because we did that in Hogwarts and look how well that turned out!" Nicole said, "No, this time we have to keep them apart."

"I don't know if I can do that," Sirius said slowly, "Its Lily and James."

"You want her hurt?" Nicole asked, "Again?"

Sirius shook his head, "No."

"Okay, well this is the only way. Everything will be fine once James marries the ice witch."

"This feels wrong."

Nicole stood up, "This is the only way. Trust me."

"So what are we going to do?" Sirius asked laying back down.

"That's the problem I don't know. I want to say that I really don't think that Lily would ever go out with him again, but I don't know."

"Well to be honest, I don't think that it's going to be much of a problem. I really don't think that James is going to break up with Jessica. As much as I want him to, I don't see it happening. I know that he isn't happy with her but he seems to have convinced himself that he's in love with her."

"How do you really know that he isn't? He could actually love her," Nicole said.

"How could anyone love that?" Sirius said making a face.

"I can't really tell you, I don't know the woman. All I know is that Lily can't be with James again," Nicole said, "It'll be stupid to put herself through that again. It's weird because I actually thought that they were meant to be together."

"So…you know why he cheated on her?"

Nicole shook her head, "Er, I kinda slapped him and walked away."

Sirius raised his eyebrows, "Nice…"

Nicole looked down, "The thing is I really don't feel bad about it. I was just really angry with him. I mean we spent so much of our time at Hogwarts trying to get them together and then he blows it by cheating on her. I always just thought that Lily was being stubborn about the whole thing. So here I was being a bad best friend thinking that Lily was the one who ruined it."

"Yeah but we don't know why he cheated on her," Sirius said.

Nicole rolled her eyes, "I'm not going to hit you because I know that you're just saying that because he's your friend."

Sirius looked at her shocked, "That's never stopped you before."

"Yeah consider yourself lucky I'm just in shock myself."

* * *

Nicole knocked on Lily's apartment who answered it somewhat surprised, "Hey."

"Hey," Nicole said.

She walked past Lily who held open the door for her. Nicole was a little more than surprised herself; James Potter was sitting on the couch. She wasn't exactly sure how she felt about this. James was squeezing himself into Lily's life once again. That wasn't something Nicole was going to let happen. She wanted what was best for Lily and James staying away was what was best for Lily.

"Hey, Nicole," James said smiling.

"Hey," Nicole said not rudely but not exactly friendly either, "Um, James do you think that you could, er, go? I've got to talk to Lily about something…important. Sorry."

"Um, that's cool. I should go see Sirius anyway. I haven't seen in a couple days, he's probably going to kill me," James said standing up.

Nicole watched as Lily and James exchanged an awkward goodbye. Nicole sighed; she didn't expect to find James at Lily's. She was worried that this was going to take more work than she originally thought. She was after all only one person and Sirius at Mungos it looked like she was going to be doing most of the work.

Lily sat down with a weird look on her face, something about it worried Nicole. She just wanted her friend to be happy and James Potter only promised heartbreak. Lily looked up and smiled, "So, you wanted to talk to me about something?"

Nicole frowned confused, until she remembered why she came, "Oh, yeah! Sorry I forgot." Nicole sat down on the couch next to Lily, "Okay so you're probably going to say no but I need you to really think about this before you give your answer."

Lily looked at Nicole cautiously, "What?"

"I need you to do a humongous favor for me…and Adam. Now please have an open mind about this. See, Adam's cousin is coming to visit for a week and Adam and I had tickets to see this play while he was visiting. Well Adam doesn't want his cousin to feel like a third wheel and well I was hoping that you would come to."

Lily face dropped, "I think you know my answer."

Nicole dropped to her knees and started begging, "Please, Lils! I know that you hate blind dates but really this is completely different!"

"How is this different? This sounds exactly like that time you tried to set me up with one of your co-workers," Lily said.

"No, this is different because this time I really need you to go. Adam and I haven't been out in a proper date since we moved in together and I really just want a night with him. I can't get that if his cousin is mopping beside us," Nicole said, "Please, please, please, please!

Lily's shoulders dropped a little, "You're so not going to make this easy on me, are you?"

Nicole shook her head, "Please, I'll owe you big. Just please do this for me?"

"Ugh, fine!" Lily said throwing her hands up, "But you so owe me!"

Nicole grinned, jumped up and hugged her friend, "You are amazing! Thanks soooo much!"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah."

* * *

"Of course, just remember not to mix those two again," Lily said to the twenty five year old man.

The man smiled, "Don't worry I won't be in a rush to do that again."

Lily gave a small smile and watched him leave. She shook her head; she could no longer be surprised by patients anymore. She walked quickly to her office at the end of the hall. She wasn't at all surprised to find Julia sitting in her usual chair munching on a burger.

"Thank god," Julia said, "I feel like I've been alone far too long. You realize that your office is rather boring, right?"

Lily rolled her eyes and sat in her chair, "Sorry I didn't have time to install an amusement park."

"Now that is an idea!" Julia said.

"Ummm…sorry but I really don't have time for an amusement park," Lily said shaking her head.

"Whatever, hey you got a letter while you were off saving the floor," Julia said grinning.

Lily rolled her eyes, "Funny."

Lily looked down and saw the letter Julia was talking about. She hadn't seen it when she first sat down. She picked it up and saw her name in small slanted curvy letters. Lily looked at the unfamiliar handwriting and frowned, "Hum, wonder who it's from?"

Julia rolled her eyes, "I don't know…maybe try opening it?"  
Lily smiled, "Pushy are we?"

Julia just nodded as Lily opened it. Lily was surprised to find it was from her old headmaster.

Lily,

I have some matters to discuss with you and hope that you would meet me at Hogwarts for a chat. Please owl back as soon as you can. I would like to meet soon.

My regards,

Albus Dumbledore

"It's from my old headmaster, he wants to meet with me," Lily said frowning.

"Really? I wonder what about," Julia said looking at the parchment with curiosity.

"I dunno," Lily said staring at it with the same curiosity.

"Oh! I forgot to tell you!" Julia said coming out of her trance, "Okay so guess what!"

Lily stared at her friend strangely, "You forgot to tell me yet you're telling me to guess what it is?"

"Oh come on Lils," Julia said smiling like crazy.

"I don't know, just tell me."

"Well Steve and I have a really big date this Saturday!" Julia said, "He's like making a really big deal about it and has been pretty secretive about where we are going. I think he might purpose!"

Lily smiled trying to be happy for her friend, "That's so exciting!"

"I know!" Julia said, "But I really don't want to get my hopes up though. I mean what if he doesn't? I don't want to be disappointed if he doesn't."

"I hate to tell you but you've already got your hoped up," Lily said smiling.

"Yeah I guess you're right!" Julia said laughing.

It was quite moment while Lily organized her desk and then she said, "Well you're not the only one with news."

Julia looked up from the floor, "Yeah?"

Lily nodded, "I've got a date Saturday to." She was nearly excited about it as Julia was about her date.

Julia's face lit up, "Really? Oh my god, Lily! That's so exciting. You haven't had a date in forever! So who is it with?"

Lily made a face, "Not exactly sure, its Adam's cousin."

Julia started laughing, "No way. I can't believe that Nicole finally got you to go on one of her blind date set ups. That's hilarious."

"Not so much," Lily said with narrowed eyes, "I'm only doing this as a favor to Nicole."

Julia put up her hands, "You don't have to tell me. Anyway I think it's a great idea. You need to get out and meet a guy. If it works out with him we can go out on a double date, maybe even a triple date."

"Are you going to start planning the wedding now to?" Lily asked slightly amused at her friend's enthusiasm.

Julia grinned, "Oh yeah, I can picture it now…to bad I can't picture him…"

"Don't get too excited, I'm not exactly thrilled about this. I doubt that there will be a second date."

Julia rolled her eyes, "That's your problem, Lily."

"I wasn't aware that I had a problem," Lily said leaning back.

"Yeah that's part of them problem. You're writing this guy off already and you haven't even met him. Give him and chance, be open minded."

"I am open minded; anyway give me some of your fries. I'm starving," Lily said leaning over and grabbing some.

* * *

James sat on his bed staring at the wall wishing there was a right answer for everything. He hadn't been this confused about everything since Lily broke up with him. Now she was back in his life and she wasn't making it any easier this time around. He was even more confused as to why he was even thinking about her but that was always Lily, she would seep into his brain until there was no room left for anything else.

He stood up this wasn't right. He had to quit thinking about her; he had a wedding to plan. He loved Jessica, no question about it. You weren't with someone for this long if you didn't love them. Then why was he thinking about that kiss so much? It shouldn't even have happened. He knew that he shouldn't be feeling guilty about it. He didn't even kiss her back but then again she never really gave him time to. So there was no telling what he would have done.

"Dumbledore wants to see us," Nicole said from the doorway.

James looked up surprised to see her, "What?"

"Dumbledore wants to see us," She repeated, "I think he found out. I knew we should have just told him right away."

James didn't answer but stood up, "Right."

Nicole frowned, "What's wrong with you?"

"Huh? Nothing, not a thing."

Nicole rolled her eyes, "You're worse than Lily."

"Wait, what does that mean?" He asked following her down the hall.

She ignored his question, "Come on, he wants us to meet him at Hogwarts."

"He does?" James asked.

She nodded, "Yeah. We have to apparate to Hogsmade."

"Wait, you sure that he knows?" James asked.

Nicole gave him a 'what-are-you-stupid' look, "Yeah I'm sure."

They pulled out their wands and apparated to Hogsmade, the village outside of Hogwarts. James was kind of nervous, what he did was extremely dangerous. He followed Nicole's purposeful steps. He wanted to ask Nicole about what she knew but instead he asked, "How's Lily?"

Nicole didn't answer right away. She seemed to be giving it a lot of thought, "Fine."

He raised his eyebrow, "That's it? Fine? She can't possibly be just fine. I mean after everything that she's been through I'm sure she anything but just fine."

Nicole stopped walking, surprising him. Facing him she said, "What do you want Potter?"

"Uh, what do you mean?" He asked confused.

"Do you want me to tell you that she's in bad shape after what happened?"

"What, no-

"You want to jump on your white horse and save the damsel in distress?" She asked.

"Whoa, Nicole I just asked a simple question," James said holding up his hands.

"And I gave you a simple answer. Funny how the person that asks the simple question wants more than a simple answer. She's fine James, perfectly fine. In fact she's so fine that she's going on a date tomorrow."

Nicole started walking again leaving poor James standing there trying to take in what she had just said. A date? Lily and some guy? What? He realized that she had already started walking so he rushed up beside her again.

"A date? With who?" He asked.

They arrived at the castle door and walked through. It was still summer so there were no students running around. James who had never been to Hogwarts when school was not in session thought it looked a little empty without the students. Just being there made him miss his school days.

"It doesn't matter," Nicole said, "The point is that Lily is a strong girl and can handle anything."

"Are you forgetting that I'm the one that saved her? Because I was there, I saw how scared she was."

Nicole stopped again. They had made it to the Headmaster's office without James realizing it. She turned to James again, "James, I don't hate you but I don't really like you either. You see you have a bit of a problem showing up at the times that you're least wanted." She turned around and said, "Lemon pop."

Nicole started forward but stopped when James said, "I'm pretty sure that Lily didn't see it that way when I showed up at Sam's."

Nicole snapped around and narrowed her eyes, "James, you do not want to mess with me."

James was sure that he saw Nicole's hands twitch to reach her wand but instead she turned around and walked up the stairs to Dumbledore's office. James sighed, he did not know how or when the conversation went bad but he was pretty sure that Nicole could do him some major harm if she wanted to.

Nicole felt a little bad after she saw the look on James' face but she just got chewed out by Moody and she really needed to get her anger out. If it weren't for Lily she wouldn't have anything against James but she felt the need to protect her best friend. Maybe it was her way of trying to make up for all the lies, she didn't know. She just wanted Lily safe.

* * *

**Hey everyone! I'm so so so so sorry for the delay for this chapter. I wasn't purposely making you guys wait. I had most of this chapter done for a while but something came up. It's a little too personal to say even though you don't know who I am. It's that bad. Anyway I'm not exactly happy with this chapter but I'm having trouble writing right now. I'm not really happy with anything I do right now though but I only think that's because of what happened. Anyway I hope you guys review this shitty chapter anyway and thanks to those who reviewed the last one. I'll try to get the next chapter up soon. **


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